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ReviewsSaints Row IV: The Kotaku Review
Saints Row IV, much like its predecessor, is a game that doesn’t make any excuses for itself. It knows exactly what it is and just how much it caters to the lowest common denominator. And you know what? It straight up loves it. It relishes it. And I love Saints Row IV for it. If…
By Tina Amini -
ReviewsThe Bureau: XCOM Declassified: The Kotaku Review
In an early mission of The Bureau: XCOM Declassified, a deer clattered across the pavement of a wrecked college town’s main drag as I took my orders. It paused and looked at me, and I at it. Even before this invasion, that deer’s world was under constant threat from death-dealing technology beyond its comprehension. What…
By Owen Good -
Reviews
About That Disney Infinity Review…
In a perfect world, this image would have a little yellow circle in the top left corner, and this article would be titled: Disney Infinity: The Kotaku Review. Unfortunately, this is not the case. First off, shipping issues kept the proper version of Disney’s ambitious toys meets video games project from arriving until Friday morning.…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsTales of Xillia The Kotaku Review
Tales of Xillia is pretty awesome. You should totally play it. That’s exactly the sort of review I would have written back in 1995 had I played the very first game in Namco’s long-running role-playing series, Tales of Phantasia, on the Super Famicom. I would have tweaked the wording slightly for each subsequent game, maybe…
By Mike Fahey -
Reviews
Plants Vs. Zombies 2 Is Free-To-Play That’s Better Without Paying
You can spend five dollars in Plants Vs. Zombies 2: It’s About Time to advance from Ancient Egypt to the Pirate Seas. You can unlock enhancements with cash, or use your real money to purchase in-game currency, stocking up on power-ups and using them to blow through every level. Or just keep your money and…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsWe’d Be Happier People If We Lived In This Colorful, Blocky Paradise
What could possibly be more welcome than colorful geometric shapes with corners gently rounded for virtual safety? How about if they had googly eyes? What if they could come to life? What if you breathed life into the inhabitants of this bright and innocent Blocksworld? Doesn’t that sound like a pleasant sort of god to…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsDragon’s Crown: The Kotaku Review
Vanillaware’s tribute to classic side-scrolling action role-playing games has garnered a lot of attention over the past few years for its exaggerated, overly-sexualized character designs. An hour into playing the actual game, I stopped noticing. Those designs don’t go away, of course. There isn’t a piece of equipment in the game capable of covering up…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsPopeyes Chicken Waffle Tenders: The Snacktaku Review
Did you really think I’d let July 29 go by without a review of the most exciting fast food item to hit the market since something really exciting I can’t think of right now? I sure didn’t. I am horribly sick, and not just mentally. My whole body aches, I am in and out of…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsIt’s Hard To Play Square’s Vampire Game When The Hero’s This Sexy
While an Unreal Engine 3-powered vampire hunting period piece set in an alternate 19th century Paris may sound pretty compelling, the coolest thing about Square Enix’s Bloodmasque is facial mapping technology console developers gave up on years ago. Seriously, look at my character. Those partial black-framed glasses; the beard that stops before his chin; those…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsShin Megami Tensei IV: The Kotaku Review
My favorite character in Shin Megami Tensei IV didn’t make the front cover of the North American release. She’s not one of the samurai warriors tasked with keeping the world’s demons in check. She’s not technically even a real person, much less a she. Her name is Burroughs, and she’s the keeper of the menus.…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsRuffles Crispy Fries: The Snacktaku National French Fry Day Review
You didn’t realize tomorrow is National French Fry Day, did you? How come you always forget the yearly nationwide celebration of fried potato sticks, but a major corporation like Frito-Lay preps ahead of time, rolling out a brand-new Ruffles product to coincide with the holiday? Oh don’t give me that commercial holiday bullshit. Tomorrow is…
By Mike Fahey
