-
ReviewsWe’d Be Happier People If We Lived In This Colorful, Blocky Paradise
What could possibly be more welcome than colorful geometric shapes with corners gently rounded for virtual safety? How about if they had googly eyes? What if they could come to life? What if you breathed life into the inhabitants of this bright and innocent Blocksworld? Doesn’t that sound like a pleasant sort of god to…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsDragon’s Crown: The Kotaku Review
Vanillaware’s tribute to classic side-scrolling action role-playing games has garnered a lot of attention over the past few years for its exaggerated, overly-sexualized character designs. An hour into playing the actual game, I stopped noticing. Those designs don’t go away, of course. There isn’t a piece of equipment in the game capable of covering up…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsPopeyes Chicken Waffle Tenders: The Snacktaku Review
Did you really think I’d let July 29 go by without a review of the most exciting fast food item to hit the market since something really exciting I can’t think of right now? I sure didn’t. I am horribly sick, and not just mentally. My whole body aches, I am in and out of…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsIt’s Hard To Play Square’s Vampire Game When The Hero’s This Sexy
While an Unreal Engine 3-powered vampire hunting period piece set in an alternate 19th century Paris may sound pretty compelling, the coolest thing about Square Enix’s Bloodmasque is facial mapping technology console developers gave up on years ago. Seriously, look at my character. Those partial black-framed glasses; the beard that stops before his chin; those…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsShin Megami Tensei IV: The Kotaku Review
My favorite character in Shin Megami Tensei IV didn’t make the front cover of the North American release. She’s not one of the samurai warriors tasked with keeping the world’s demons in check. She’s not technically even a real person, much less a she. Her name is Burroughs, and she’s the keeper of the menus.…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsRuffles Crispy Fries: The Snacktaku National French Fry Day Review
You didn’t realize tomorrow is National French Fry Day, did you? How come you always forget the yearly nationwide celebration of fried potato sticks, but a major corporation like Frito-Lay preps ahead of time, rolling out a brand-new Ruffles product to coincide with the holiday? Oh don’t give me that commercial holiday bullshit. Tomorrow is…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsNCAA Football 14: The Kotaku Review
The meanest thing I ever did in high school I did to a senior on the football team. His teammates were in my computer class, snickering about his hope of playing big time ACC football. I was a scrawny sophomore trying to be popular. I helped them forge some Clemson letterhead, and signed it “Head…
By Owen Good -
ReviewsThe New Razer Blade Ultra-Thin Gaming Laptop: The Kotaku Review
At a mere .66 inches thick and powerful enough to capably handle some of the most demanding games on the market, Razer’s new 14-inch Blade might be the coolest piece of equipment I’ve ever played a PC game on. It’s certainly the hottest. Once known for its mid-to-high-end gaming peripherals, Razer has gotten to a…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsLollyphile Gourmet Lollipops: The Snacktaku Review
Simple yet elegant, seductive while at the same time innocent, the lollipop is one of the true icons of the candy snacking world. It deserves the star treatment, which is exactly what San Francisco-born, Austin-raised candy company Lollyphile delivers. Lollipops have come a long way since sweet-cravers in the Middle Ages dipped sticks in boiled…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsDeadpool: The Kotaku Review
My initial foray into the world of High Moon Studios’ Deadpool video game culminated in an intimate moment in the eponymous character’s filthy bathroom. Pants around his hideously-scarred ankles, our hero strains. “It’s burns!” he cries, and it does — but it also feels kind of good. Following a phone call from the game’s developer…
By Mike Fahey -
ReviewsSometimes All A Game Needs Is Color, Shape and Music
One of the most popular puzzle games on Android and iOS right now does not contain birds, angry or otherwise. There are no rotating blocks. You don’t have to match three of anything. Physics isn’t a particular concern, and power-ups are completely unnecessary. Shapes, colors and sounds — that’s all Color Zen needs. Upon first…
By Mike Fahey
