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  The Dorkly Weekly: A Kakuna Named Pikachu

  Last week we featured the premiere episode of Dorkly’s Pokémon Rusty, a series that follows the adventures of a less-than-proficient Pokémon trainer. I questioned Rusty’s choice of Kakuna as his starter Pokémon. This week he proves there’s no problem you can’t overcome by ripping a gaping hole in continuity. Kakuna cannot do what he does…

  By Mike Fahey Published July 23, 2012
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  Fake Gamer of the Week: Watch Out, She’s About to Unleash Her Super Move

  That sly look. The firm grip on the joystick. The dramatic pause. No, she’s not flirting with you. She’s warning you. Here comes her ultimate super move. You might think there are no super moves in an ancient arcade game that only costs a quarter to play. You would be wrong. “But that’s Galaga” you…

  By Mike Fahey Published July 23, 2012
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  Witness the Great and Terrible Power of Kotaku Off-Kilter

  It’s time for fake gamers, snack foods, silly videos and possibly cats. It’s pretty great, and sometimes pretty terrible. It’s Kotaku Off-Kilter!

  By Mike Fahey Published July 23, 2012
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  Torchlight II Is Much Bigger Than Torchlight. How Much Bigger? This Much Bigger.

  Torchlight II is going to be a heck of a lot bigger than Torchlight. Runic founder Travis Baldree has written a blog post on the game’s site detailing just how much bigger. By his reckoning, Torchlight II is about four times the size of its predecessor. Here’s the breakdown in helpful infographic form: Size Matters:…

  By Kirk Hamilton Published July 23, 2012
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  Movies No Longer Exist in The Last of Us’s Ruined Future

  You’ll find things when you explore the disease-destroyed world of The Last of Us. Some of those things—weapons and ammo and other items that you need to survive the game’s post-apocalypse—will be physical. Other discoverables will come in the form of information, like the fact that Ellie—the 14-year-old girl that players will be protecting in…

  By Evan Narcisse Published July 23, 2012
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  Square Enix’s Next 3DS RPG Draws From Final Fantasy V

  The ridiculously titled Bravely Default: Flying Fairy will use a job system similar to Final Fantasy V, according to a report by Dengeki Online (as translated by Andriasang). You’ll get to use two types of abilities: Job Commands—active skills you can borrow from either your current job or one you’ve used before—and Support Abilities, which…

  By Jason Schreier Published July 23, 2012
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  Good Thing This Annoying Gears of War Enemy Doesn’t Actually Exist

  Count yourselves lucky, Gears of War lovers. Unbeknownst to you, one of the most annoying enemies in Epic Games’ sci-fi shooter franchise could have gotten even more aggravating. I’ve seen it in action and, guys, we’re lucky this thing hasn’t made it past the testing stage. The video above is from the Gears of War…

  By Evan Narcisse Published July 23, 2012
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  Watching These People Play The ‘Slenderman’ Game Is Almost Scarier Than Playing For Yourself

  There’s something special about watching someone else play a horror game. Particularly one you’ve already played. It’s the mark of a truly scary game—once it catches on, there follows a growing number of videos of people playing, and being freaked out by, the game. It became popular with Amnesia: Dark Descent—I certainly lost a couple…

  By Kirk Hamilton Published July 23, 2012
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  The Prettiest Tech Demo Ever Created Gets a Stunning DirectX 11 Makeover

  In 2002 NVIDIA released “Dawn”, a high-end DirectX 9 tech demo featuring a beautiful forest fairy that captured the hearts and minds of PC gamers all over the world. That mystical creature looks even more gorgeous ten years later. The original “Dawn” tech demo was a revolution in PC graphics, the first time a character…

  By Mike Fahey Published July 23, 2012
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  One of Those Teenagers Who Makes Xbox Live Gaming So, Uh, Interesting Will Answer Your Questions Now

  We’re going to call this kid Reilly. He’s 17 but has been infuriating gamers on Xbox Live since he was in the fourth grade. He doesn’t just like to beat you at games online, he likes to, in his words, terrorize you. He likes to curse at you, toss in some uglier language. You fill…

  By Stephen Totilo Published July 23, 2012
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  The Great, Terrible, Incredibly Important Dark Knight Rises Game

  The official video game for The Dark Knight Rises costs $7, looks amazing on my iPad, is a bit of a mess and is one of the most important video games of the year. It’s also not as good as the movie. Not even close…and that’s even if you didn’t think that highly of the…

  By Stephen Totilo Published July 23, 2012
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  We Will See The Tech Behind The Next Metal Gear Solid On August 30

  Metal Gear Solid creator Hideo Kojima will show off his new Fox Engine on August 30, he said in an interview posted on the PlayStation blog today The Fox Engine, which Kojima and his team have been developing since the release of Metal Gear Solid 4 in 2008, will run the next Metal Gear Solid…

  By Jason Schreier Published July 23, 2012
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  Esports

  Watch Some Of The Greatest Moments In StarCraft II History

  Even if you’re not an avid StarCraft II fan, you still might enjoy this montage of the competitive game’s greatest moments, all compiled from high-level tournaments in which professional StarCraft II players compete for cash and glory. The last moment is the best, but the whole video is pretty damn great. I made a video…

  By Jason Schreier Published July 23, 2012
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  Assassin’s Creed’s New Black Heroine Represents a New Kind of Liberation

  Aveline—heroine of Assassin’s Creed Liberation for the PlayStation Vita—isn’t that different from the other characters of Ubisoft’s historical action series . Like Altair and Ezio, she’s an Assassin, a near-mystical stealth warrior with abilities that let her be unseen whenever she wants. But one thing about her stands out compared to those two. The idea…

  By Evan Narcisse Published July 23, 2012
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  Final Fantasy‘s Creator Trades Swords for Surfboards

  Hironobu Sakaguchi is a big surfer. He also makes video games. Party Wave is Sakaguchi bringing his love for both together. But is the result a party? Or a bust? Going into Party Wave, I only had one thing in mind: T&C Surf Designs is the greatest surfing game I’ve ever played—or rather, it sure…

  By Brian Ashcraft Published July 23, 2012
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  Time Traveling Dance Central 3 Gets an October Release Date and Vanilla Ice

  The motion tracking dance game that made Kinect seem so interesting turns three-games-old this fall, as Harmonix announces an October 16 release date for Dance Central 3, the only game to combine “Ice, Ice Baby”, the Macarena and time travel. At this point I might pick up Dance Central 3 just to ironically listen to…

  By Mike Fahey Published July 23, 2012
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  Talk Amongst Yourselves

  It’s the last full week of July. Things are only going to get hotter from here. Keep your cool, everyone. Go on and talk about the games you’re playing, loving and hating. Head over to Talk Amongst Yourselves, the place where we gather on a daily basis to discuss all things video game and existential.…

  By Evan Narcisse Published July 23, 2012
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  They Should’ve Called Him Deckard Bane

  I saw The Dark Knight Rises this weekend, and while I thought it was absolutely wonderful, there was one thing that kept distracting me: the villain, Bane, sounds exactly like Diablo mainstay Deckard Cain. Deckard Bane, if you will. Here’s proof. Above: Deckard Cain saying his catchphrase, “Stay a while and listen.” Below: one of…

  By Jason Schreier Published July 23, 2012
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  The Colorful Character Creation of Guild Wars 2‘s Most Exotic Races

  This past weekend’s final Guild Wars 2 beta event gave players access to the plant-based Sylvari and the Muppet-based Asura for the first time. Thousands of new characters were made, and it looked something like this. As expected, the Asura are now officially the cutest thing ever. Those big eyes, the floppy ears, the air…

  By Mike Fahey Published July 23, 2012
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  The Argument For a Very Violent Scene in a Very Violent Video Game

  After our hero Kratos wrestles the elephant monster in God of War: Ascension to the ground, he—you—can make him stab the creature in the head. You can make him stab repeatedly. Then, at your command, Kratos slits the head open to reveal the monster’s brain. “That’s too much,” I blurted out, when David Hewitt, the…

  By Stephen Totilo Published July 23, 2012