Still Patiently Awaiting All Those ‘Vita is Doomed’ Stories

In today’s portable edition of Speak Up on Kotaku, commenter Domini N wonders when everyone is going to get around to forecasting the death of the PS Vita like they did with the 3DS last year. You know, I really, really don’t want to have to say this, but why have I seen no “Vita…

For Women Like You: Identifying with Lollipop Chainsaw‘s Heroine, Juliet

“You need to start taking better care of yourself. You need all the help you can get. Men don’t go for women like you.” “What is ‘like me’?” We are at a department store. My mother picks up a brassiere and hovers it over my chest as she closes one eye, sizing me up. “Raped…

When You Cross Adventure Time With Smash Bros. You Get Awesome

Even with an upcoming DS game on the way, I still cannot have my fill of Adventure Time. Particularly video game versions of Adventure Time, and especially considering how insultingly short the iOS game was. If Charlie Bink could have his way, there’d be a beautiful Smash Bros.-esque game based on the brawling adventures of…

Make Your Own Tunes In This Incredible Interactive Beatbox

Somehow or other I had never heard about incredibox, an interactive beatbox application that lets you drag-and-drop your own perfectly in tune, quantized grooves. Initial thoughts of “Oh, this seems cute” quickly gave way to “Man, this is brilliant.” The animations on the little beatbox dudes, the way their eyes follow your mouse pointer as…

Chik-Fil-A Flap Added to 2012 Campaign Game, Iran Attack De-Emphasized

The Political Machine, the PC game that lets you play out the Obama-Romney race for yourself has been updated to keep up with current events (and tweak some gameplay). Now you can make your candidate be for or against Chik-Fi-Let, which presumably means being for or against the fast food chain’s opposition to gay marriage…

Four Comics That Will Prey On Your Fears This Week

If you’re here in the Panel Discussion programming block, you might be a lapsed comics reader, trying to find a way back to the JLA Satellite. Or you might someone killing time until you pick up your weekly Wednesday pull list. Or maybe you’ve said goodbye to dozens of longboxes to embrace the promise of…

The Justice League Can’t Fight Their Way Out of This Terrible Video Game

Look, I’m not gonna lie: I did not have high expectations for Justice League: Earth’s Final Defense. I joked with co-worker Mike Fahey that the subtitle makes it sound like the World’s Greatest Superheroes would lose their fight. Little did I know how right that joke would prove. The iOS game developed by Chinese net…

Panel Discussion Assemble!

Are we still pretending that comics and video games don’t have anything to do with each other? Not anymore, we’re not. Welcome to Panel Discussion, where the focus will be on comic books and sequential art, whether they connect directly to video games or not. Confused? Read this

You can now pre-order Counter-Strike: Global Offensive for 10% off, and get access to the beta that starts August 14.

Sony Online Entertainment’s face-tracking SOEmote technology is now available free for all players of EverQuest 2

All of Valve’s Familiar Faces In One Battlefield

Can you point out every Valve game that makes an appearance here? Counter-Strike, Half-Life, Portal, Left 4 Dead, Team Fortress 2… the list goes on. [Video spoiler] I just wish Gordon hadn’t killed Chell, especially considering how half-assed the animation on that kill was. Plus, they seem like they’d be such good friends. Valve World…

Your Fate Does Not Concern Death In This Latest Darksiders II Trailer

Perhaps you’ve heard that Darksiders II will star Death. You hadn’t heard that? Well, it will! But sorry to say, he cares more about his brother War than he cares about you. This latest trailer is narrated by Skull-face himself, and it even ends with a roar, which as we all know is the key…

A Whole New Way To Play Video Games: Standing Up

It’s not every day you discover a whole new way to play video games. Yet over the past month, I’ve done just that—I’ve found a way to play games that makes me feel better, more alert, healthier, and more involved. How have I accomplished this? I’ve started playing video games while standing up. “Oh, damn…

The Trouble With Most High Fantasy Dialogue Is That It’s Terrible

I can pinpoint the exact line that finally broke me. Despite being an ardent fan of many books and games that use high fantasy settings, I’ve never had very much patience for some of their tropes. And last night, one ridiculous line in a thoroughly ridiculous, but mostly enjoyable, game finally pushed me over the…

First Look at Call of Duty: Black Ops II‘s Multiplayer

This is your first look at multiplayer in this November’s presumed mega-hit, Call of Duty: Black Ops II. Call of Duty fans, this is why you play, no? The battles appear to be taking place in the game’s near-future of 2025. We’ve got some most unusual knife and tomahawk kills. Some sort of microwave transmitter…

Amazon’s First Game is a Hallucinatory Minutiae-Spotters Wonderland

As mentioned this morning, Amazon.com is in the game development business. The first Facebook title from the newly-revealed Amazon Game Studios is a fresh take on the hidden object genre that’ll have you seeing things. WithinLiving Classics‘s colorful storybook exterior lies a twisted take on the hidden object puzzle games that are so prolific on…

Sound Shapes: The Kotaku Review

Though there’s a smorgasbord of audio pulsing through it, Sound Shapes won’t make a musician out of you. What it does is more esoteric and impressive than that. This new PlayStation Vita game lets you feel what it’s like to live inside a song. At its most basic, Sound Shapes has you playing your way…

Square Enix Offering Free Copies Of Final Fantasy VII To Anyone Who Bought Accidental Re-Release Last Weekend

Over the weekend, the PC rerelease of Final Fantasy VII accidentally went live. People who bought the game found themselves unable to actually play it. To apologize for the mistake, Square Enix has told Kotaku that the company will offer refunds and free copies of the game to anyone who bought it early. Here’s the…

Guy Beats Super Mario Bros. Level Without Looking at the Screen

Challenged to a blind round of Super Mario Bros.—specifically, the remake in Super Mario All-Stars—one dexterous YouTuber manages to get through the level almost unscathed. I’m pretty sure the strategy here is to jump. Many, many times over.

Game Informer is now America’s third-most popular magazine, according to official stats. Sorry, Better Homes & Gardens