I’m Too Old For This Week in Gaming Apps S**t

You kids get off of my lawn! Damn, that really does feel good. I turned 40 on Wednesday, so excuse me if I didn’t play as many gaming apps this week as you young people did. These old eyes aren’t what they used to be. Okay, not an excuse. If anything I should be playing…

In celebration of Surgeon Simulator 2013 and the indie sensation that it has become: the most disgusting cake you have ever wanted to eat. Mmmm disgustlicious. Uncensored image follows. (Surgeon Simulator 2013 via Reddit) To contact the author of this post, write to [email protected] or find her on Twitter at @tinaamini

Booker DeWitt Really Should Learn Moderation When It Comes To Eating

The thing about healing via food items is that characters start seeming like gluttons every time you want to restore your health in a game. In BioShock Infinite’s case, what with most food being stuff like cotton candy and popcorn, the situation seemed particularly ridiculous. Here’s an amusing and well-produced video by HapstanceFilms which makes…

How Are You Supposed to Enjoy Animal Crossing?

I know how to have fun playing a Mario game, a Zelda game or a Metroid game. I get Pikmin. I get Fire Emblem. Hell, I got Cubello. But I never got Nintendo’s Animal Crossing series. Help me understand! I’ve tried the GameCube version, the DS one and the Wii one. Nintendo kindly sent me…

Better (At Playing Dead) With Kinect

I was looking through my computer for an Animal Crossing image and found this image entitled Animals_PlayDead.jpg. From June 2010, via the good people at Microsoft. I had to share, because, well, this picture is just great. Really sells how…. special… the Kinect is/was. Feel free to annotate it.

Fans Angry Might & Magic Heroes VI Has Been Unplayable for 24 Hours

Over the last day or so, complaints have cropped up from players who’ve been trying to play the latest installment of the long-lived Might & Magic series. Users have turned to the game’s official Ubisoft message boards and Steam forums to vent, citing missing music, corrupt installation files and game freezes that prevent them from…

Snoop Dogg’s New Game is Essentially PaRappa The Rapper but Broken

Did you know that Snoop Dogg (né ‘Snoopy’) has a game out today? It’s true! Its also doesn’t work half the time! Way of the Dogg is a downloadable game out today for XBLA. In it, you play a blacksploitation stereotype named America Jones (let that one really sink in) whose girlfriend is shot (it’s…

FYI: Butts Are Off-limits in Nintendo Games, But Penises Aren’t

I’ve been playing Animal Crossing: New Leaf lately, in preparation for a review next month. One of the staple features in the Animal Crossing franchise is a store run by a fox. The store sells rare items and art. Like, say, this fine statue here. Let’s take a closer and uncensored look, shall we? (NSFW…

She took her calculator to prom according to The Mary Sue. Because who needs a date when you’ve got a sharply-dressed calculator? More pictures here. I wonder if anyone has ever taken a body pillow to prom?

JRPG Censorship Is Such A Silly Thing

For as long as there have been Japanese role-playing games, there has been censorship. Since the NES days, Nintendo and other big Japanese companies have been quick to stamp their big black bars on anything that might be considered offensive to American sensibilities: alcohol, religion, sex, octopus statues, whatever. And JRPGs have been the biggest…

The Moneysaver: $27 Gaming Keyboard, XCOM/Civ5 Combo $16, Blood Dragon

The time to save has come. Looking for a new gaming keyboard to match Tuesday’s mouse? We’ve literally got just the thing, and I say literally because this Logitech G105 Gaming Keyboard is also Call of Duty branded. Sure, it’s a different Call of Duty, but they’re all the same anyway (oh no he didn’t).…

Marvel Heroes Celebrates Iron Man 3 With An Open Beta Weekend

Gazillion Entertainment throws open the doors to Marvel Heroes this weekend, giving Iron Man fans across the country a chance to slip into a Stark suit and do some damage, Diablo-style. All a prospective hero has to do is register at the game’s official website and they’ll be in. The open beta event for the…

Fuse—the multiplayer shooter that evolved from a more cartoon-styled earlier version called Overstrike—will be getting a demo for PS3 and Xbox 360 on May 7th. So, if you want to see if the game will be worth your time, that’s your best chance.

This Shooter Is Doom Meets The Binding of Isaac

Maybe there’s a little Borderlands in there for good measure, too. Comparisons aside, Tower of Guns is a twitch shooter with roguelike elements that hope to keep every playthrough fresh. This means random enemies, random powerups, random bosses, many unlockables and even random levels every time you play. Excellent. From the game’s Steam Greenlight page:…

Wow, An Eternal Darkness Sequel Might Actually Happen

A sequel to Eternal Darkness—long requested and long rumored—could actually be happening soon. IGN has a teaser for the upcoming game (embedded below), which the developers are calling Shadow of the Eternals, a spiritual successor to the 2002 GameCube cult classic. Eternal Darkness game director Denis Dyack is involved with the new one too, and…

Meet Ming Mecca, 2014’s Weirdest Video Game System

If a Nintendo Entertainment System and a recording studio mixing board had a baby, it would look a lot like Ming Mecca, which is very likely the weirdest piece of new video game hardware announced this year. Or maybe any year. This trailer teases a new console/game creation tool that uses discrete analog inputs to…

GTA V, In 62 Words

Couldn’t wade through yesterday’s 5,000 word Kotaku preview of GTA V? Here’s the short version, in 62 words: Set in and around Los Santos (aka Los Angeles) You juggle playing three characters, switching at will in the open world, warping to wherever on the map one of them is going about his life Characters meet…

Sometimes It’s the Simple Things That Get Me

There are times I want to explore near photo-realistic ancient temples, battling terrifying enemies with the aid of powerful magical artifacts. I have moments where all I want to do is spend hours building armies, evaluating troop strength and capabilities and devising strategies to take advantage of my findings. Sometimes I just want to find…

Moneysaver One-Shot: Lowest Price Ever For This GeForce GTX 660

The first piece in that new gaming rig. Looking for the current full Moneysaver roundup? Click here. Come back at 2:15pm today for a brand new Moneysaver roundup. When I find a deal on the Titan I’ll let you know, but for now let’s go with fantastic value over phenomenal cosmic power. Amazon has the…

Katie Couric Gets Schooled On the Benefits of Violent Video Games

Yesterday we ran a piece exposing the scare tactics media like to use when discussing video games and violence. Flashy edits, buzzwords, complete ignorance, that sort of thing. Today Katie Couric, the host of the particular segment we analyzed, reached out to her Twitter followers to ask for the “positive side” of violent games. When…