Every Pokemon is interesting and worth talking about. I don’t play a ton of Pokemon, but I do enjoy the universe and I love learning more about the creatures in it. So, Here’s Another Pokemon! It’s Honchkrow!
Average Height: 2' 11"
Average Weight: 60.2 lbs
First Added In Generation IV
Have you ever had a boss that was a real bastard? Someone who would never forgive any of their employees for making small mistakes. The kind of boss who loved to fire people and just seemed to enjoy watching their workers suffer. Well, then you know what it’s like to be in Honchkrow’s large flock of birds. This bastard bird uses other birds to do its bidding and if any of them screw up it NEVER forgets this and I assume bullies them on Facebook.
With a single loud cry, Honchkrow can call to it a large group of Murkrows and it then orders them around, having them fetch food for it. According to Bulbapeida, Honchkrow will even use this group of loyal crows against its enemies. It will have them do all the work and then swoop in, literally, and deliver the final blow. Yes, Honchkrow is that kind of boss. The kind who lets their employees complete all the work and then takes all the credit at the end of the project. They probably get a raise for it too.
I say the Murkrow horde needs to start a union and stop their shitty boss from stepping all over them and abusing them. It’s annoying and frustrating for the Murkrow. They want to do more, but that damn Honchkrow tells them to “stick to flying.” You can do a lot while flying, Honch. I heard a Honchkrow even replaced a bunch of Murkrow who decided to try other things beyond just flying. What an asshole.
You might be wondering, what does Honchkrow do while its bird workers go out to find it food and fight its rivals? It just sits around and grooms itself. Seriously. One Pokedex entry says this about what the bastard does while Murkrows are out working: “ It idles its time away, grooming itself in its nest.” Now that’s a bad boss.
Look at that greedy asshole. And yet, when one of the Murkrow asked for a small raise he fired him and explained he didn’t have any gold to spare. Gross.
- If often gathers its group of Murkrow at night, earning it the nickname “Summoner of Night.”
- So many Murkrow can show up that the entire sky is darkened, making it appear as if it is nighttime.
- It hunts down any crows that fail it and “punishes” them. What does that mean? None of the Pokedex entries specify. I’m assuming it leaves nasty messages on their LinkedIn page.
“Considering Shedinja steals the spirit of whoever looks into its void (a void that’s fully visible from its back sprite by the way), and Dusclops absorbs the body, what happens to a person that looks at both at the same time?”
A long, drawn-out court battle set in some weird, unseen dimension of the Pokemon universe where the judge only hands out rulings via a series of bodybuilding poses.