Punk Stands Toe-To-Toe With The Rock

A strong barometer for a wrestler’s proficiency on the microphone is how well they fare against one of the all-time greats. Three weeks ahead of the 2013 Royal Rumble, it didn’t matter what The Rock said. CM Punk was better.

The Rock returned to the WWE in pursuit of the WWE Championship, a belt he hadn’t held in 10 years. Standing in his way was CM Punk, who, at the time, was the longest-running champion of the modern era.

Punk was delivering one of his signature heelish sermons, questioning why R-Truth’s imaginary friend Little Jimmy (remember him?) was better positioned on the card than Tyson Kidd and claimed that “I am successful in spite of [the fans].” Rock interrupted, defending the WWE Universe (a la John Cena), and led the crowd in a “Cookie puss, cookie puss” chant at Punk. Rather than engage The Great One in a sing-along battle, Punk did what he does best—hit his enemies with the truth.

Whether Rock had a full-time schedule or showed up once a year Santa Clause style, Punk was going to kick his ass. Boom. Punk didn’t need a “tired, lame-ass shtick” filled with rhyming and catchphrases to get over. Pow. Rock was playing at the kid’s table, while Punk was in the big leagues, swinging for the fences. Wham.8

The champ landed a final haymaker, beating Rock at his own game by pulling out a catchy one-liner: “Come Royal Rumble, understand that when you step in the ring, your arms are just too short to box with God.” Knockout punch.