Outside my current place of residence, there is a nest full of freshly hatched baby birds. They’re shapeless little blobs, embryonic amalgams of beaks and fluff. They do not look like birds. They are, in that sense, perhaps the closest living relatives of the polygonal mutant birds that appear in video game backgrounds, as highlighted…
There’s anti-cheat software, and then there’s the program Valorant’s got under its hood. When the game’s closed beta first launched, the clandestine anti-cheat was always running in the background. Now players can disable it when they’re not playing Riot’s 60 percent more wizard-y version of Counter-Strike, but it’s started to cause other issues. That is…
Between covid-19 and countless other difficulties, Overwatch League’s make-or-break third season has gone as far off the rails as anyone could have imagined. Now, after losing a star player to Valorant last week, the league has lost one of its top teams. At least, temporarily. Today, the Vancouver Titans, last year’s second-place team behind championship…
Yesterday, I finished Final Fantasy VII Remake. Today, I find myself wanting more, but only a little more. Maybe another 15-20 hours in and around Midgar, seeing the surrounding slums and deserts through the eyes of somebody who’s more relevant to the series’ larger machinations than ever? Something along those lines? I don’t know, just…
Despite the fact that it’s still in closed beta, there are many Valorant players. There are not, however, many Valorant players who are also Valorants, aka Valorant Valorant players. You can probably see why some players already find the game’s naming scheme for its top rank confusing. Less than a week ago, Valorant added its…
When this time of imposed social isolation began, I had a theory: In the absence of real human connection, some people would find themselves growing more attached than usual to video game characters. Well, dear reader, It Happened To Me. For the past handful of weeks, I—like a great many members of the zeitgeist-chasing gamer…
During a stream today, Guy “Dr Disrespect” Beahm, whose 4 million followers make him one of the most popular streamers on Twitch, shared two pieces of widely debunked coronavirus-related media with his viewers. Many viewers reacted with shock and disappointment. Others cheered him on. He never dropped his facade—never removed his trademark wig or sunglasses—but…
Today, noted embarrassing smoker, bad driver, and worse tweeter who is also somehow a billionaire Elon Musk has decided he’s JC Denton, the hero of 2000’s genre-defining cyberpunk immersive sim Deus Ex. Nobody agrees with him. Musk has spent the past couple days yelling to his 33.4 million Twitter followers about how it’s time to…
A headshot is like a tiny home run, or the world’s most densely packed bowling strike. You hit the target as perfectly as possible. Briefly, you are akin to a god, or at least one of history’s least-awful monarchs. These moments should stand out, especially when bullets are flying and chaos reigns. Valorant’s new headshot…
Jay “Sinatraa” Won isn’t just any Overwatch League player. After a stellar 2019 in which his team, the San Francisco Shock, took home championship gold, he was declared the league’s MVP. This means that the game’s developers at Blizzard will release an in-game skin to commemorate his exploits. Yesterday, during the middle of season three,…
Speaking to Kotaku, Riot has reaffirmed its commitment to snuffing out Valorant harassment issues asap, but stopped short of detailing future plans. “We know this is a hard problem to tackle, and will take time, but I’d feel irresponsible accepting this as the status quo,” executive producer Anna Donlon said in an email. Read more…
For the past couple weeks, a growing number of Twitch’s top streams have not been live, despite claiming to be. In order to maximize viewership gain from Valorant’s beta key drop system, some streamers have been tossing up non-live footage to keep streams going 24/7. Now, that’s no longer allowed. Twitch announced the change to…
Three weeks ago, I added a campsite to my Animal Crossing: New Horizons island. Three weeks ago, Leopold, a walking testament to unearned confidence, showed up. Three weeks ago, I stopped unlocking new features in Animal Crossing This is Leopold: Leopold sucks. From the word go, Leopold crammed several TED Talks’ worth of humble bragging…
It is a regrettable sign of our times that women sharing videos of vocal, sustained harassment they’ve received in specific competitive multiplayer games has become a genre unto itself. The latest game: Riot’s still-in-testing tactical shooter Valorant. The latest person to share a video: A Riot employee. Late last week, a Riot UX designer who…
If you take a look at many of Twitch’s top Valorant streams right now, you’ll note that they claim to be running “24/7.” This might strike you as odd, given that human beings generally need to eat, sleep, and all that fancy, life-sustaining jazz. Most of these streams, however, are not actually live. At least,…
Who doesn’t love voice lines in Overwatch? They let you say hello. They can help your teammates stay abreast of your ultimate percentage. If you play DPS, you can use them to spam messages about how you need healing until everybody else’s ears seal closed like ancient pharaoh tombs. But soon, Blizzard is going to…
Chimera Squad is a fitting subtitle for the new XCOM game, because it’s a chimera of a game. Sure, it’s got XCOM’s turn-based tactical head on its shoulders, but it’s being ferried about on Overwatch’s body by Divinity: Original Sin 2‘s legs. 12 hours in, I’m still having trouble deciding if this monster of a…
Crafting a memorable album cover is a nearly unfathomable art. An artist must catch the zeitgeist with their bare hands and run it through a prism that spits out something equal parts strange, broadly appealing, and impossible to look away from. Weirdly, though, very few of these so-called “geniuses” add cartoon dogs to their masterpieces.…
Twitch’s gardening section contains multitudes. Some people broadcast apple orchards. Others build birdhouses. Others play Stardew Valley. But at most times of the day, those streams are crowded out by one of the most instantly recognizable plants on earth: the seven-armed starfish, Beelzebub’s kale salad, other names I didn’t just make up. I speak, of…
Final Fantasy VII Remake is one of the most luxurious video games I’ve ever played. Nearly 20 hours in, Cloud’s character model still causes me to audibly gasp every time I see him from a new angle. The friggin’ pipes in this game tell a story, with grimy textures that make me feel like I…
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