What the Hell is in the Water in Barrie, Ont.?

Illustration for article titled What the Hell is in the Water in Barrie, Ont.?

Remember Barrie, Ontario? It's the home of Brandon Crisp, who ran away after his console was confiscated, and was later found dead. It's also home to a teenager who ran away to meet his 42-year-old "soulmate" from World of Warcraft.


According to Toronto's Globe and Mail, Andrew Kane, 16, "nonchalantly" asked his mom and dad if they would drive him to a motel where he would meet up with a woman who'd flown up from Texas to meet him. They weren't too keen on that idea. So he went back upstairs to tell the woman - a mother of two - he couldn't make the date. Mom and dad went back to check on him - at 2 a.m. - and lo and behold he was gone.


Kane was missing for two days. The Globe and Mail, drolly identifiying Kane and Lauri Price, 42, as "the couple" were found Thursday in a store in a nearby town. Ms. Price said whoa-whoa-whoa he told me he was 20, but it doesn't matter, 16 is the age of consent up in Canada anyway, so she's not gonna face charges.

The Globe and Mail has all of the creepy-creepy, as can only be supplied by two delusional lovebirds, one of whom got her college degree before the other was born. Obligatory game addiction mention, too.

Teen Found After Meeting his 42-year-old Online 'Soulmate' [The Globe and Mail, Toronto]

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"What the Hell is in the Water in Barrie, Ont.?"

I think it's something in the Tim Horton's coffee. An additive that suppresses aggression in the general population. However, in 10% of the populace it causes mental instability.