Have we posted about this? Seriously? No? Wow. Just wow. David Hasselhoff stars in four smarmy infomercials for Command & Conquer: Red Alert 3, and the self-deprecation and irony are set to 11. So is the Hoff's BAC. Listen that guy is slurring his speech, I don't care what anyone says, the man's lit. I would be too. Seriously, does he have a brain injury I don't know about, and now I'm an asshole for picking on him? Wild. But wait, there's more, that phone number at the top? Yeah, it works. Call it and you can hear Hoff and a robot voice engage in slightly nonsequiturish dialogue, or his choice for president of the United States. You may also leave him a message. I asked if he enjoyed Early Times before he shot the vids. Sorry, there was no embed code. Someone's job depends on the site visits, you know. Conquer This Life [website, thanks jiles] Oh and here's his most awesome stunt ever. I like the fact he has a fucking car that talks, but he still has to hit turbo boost manually.