Illustration for article titled Salvation Army Bell Ringer Shoplifts Video Games, BB Gun, Sex Toy

I'm trying to see what the real news is here: On one hand, a Salvation Army bell-ringer stole a BB gun, two video games and a vibrator from a Kmart. On the other, Kmart sells vibrators?


Lest you think this is the Hitachi Wand, a "personal massager" that has some non-masturbatory applications, cops in Sterling Heights, Mich. identified the purloined plasti-penis as a "Trojan" brand vibe. Also he made off with a bottle of K-Y so this one was definitely headed up old dirt road.

Cops say the ding-a-ling ringer, an unnamed 21-year-old Detroiter working for $8 an hour, got a five-finger discount on a BB gun and ammo on Dec. 5; the lube and the vibe on Dec. 7, and then finally the two "Xbox games" on Dec. 15, when his crime wave came to an end.


The Xbox games were not identified. Any guesses as to what he was picking up?

Salvation Army bell ringer caught stealing from Sterling Heights Kmart [Advisor & Source]

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