Saints Row: The Third's Latest Trailer Takes You to Tron-Land with the Deckers

McWhertor told me the other day that when it comes in, I'll be in charge of the review for Saints Row: The Third. Mkay. I suppose I should familiarize myself with this game by watching this trailer. Let's see, we've got gangs, driving sequences, gunplay, cyber-demons with giant swords and Tank Pong from Combat. Nice of Mike to give me the straightforward assignments.


Compelling trailer, but I'm wondering how much of that tour in the Deckers' cyber-net hell whatever-it-is, is actual gameplay and how much is either cutscene or quicktime event. Gun combat on the game grid looks like it's taken from gameplay, at least. Then again, if you can beat up people with giant dildos (dildoes?) why not go toe-to-toe with huge swords?

Saints Row The Third arrives Nov. 15. I've got a lot of catching up to do.

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Well, now, apparently stating I don't find this game interesting sparked a controversy I did not see coming. Which was naive of me; I mean, it's the Internet - when is something not ever a reason for controversy?

Seeing as some people apparently considered it a dickish move, even though I didn't say it was awful or anything and just meant that it's not really my type of game and has failed to attract my attention so far, I'm going to spend a few more seconds trying to redeem myself by stating clearly and for everyone why this just doesn't attract me at all.

It's not that it's a bad game - from what I recall, reviews of the last games in the series were average, which means it's a fine game, just not considered remarkable or memorable by reviewers, which is okay; not all games need to be shocking or immersive, and I've always been a big proponent of fun as the main reason for playing videogames, as some of you might know. It's just that it feels like it's trying too hard to seem immature and relevant. I saw the video where you could shoot yourself from a cannon or suck up people and now this thinly-veiled parody of TRON: Legacy; I've also seen the developers attack Grand Theft Auto IV through interviews and even, if I recall correctly, a video or two, for trying to be more meaningful and serious. Thing is, they just seem to be trying to imitate the appeal of older GTA games in a more exaggerated Jackass style, whilst parodying everything moderately recent in an effort to feel fresh and modern. The gameplay itself, however, just seems a copy of Grand Theft Auto focusing on the cheap "lulz", and, while I love having fun, I'm not that easily amused by stuff meant to be purposefully ridiculous (such as memes, for instance).

Now, I say it again: that doesn't mean I find the game bad. I just don't feel the same appeal for it that some people do and stated it in two sentences. Just like I don't feel any of the appeal for soccer that some of my friends have so fervently. I'd apologize for my tastes if they weren't my own and not affecting anyone.

I hope that's settled now.