It's a well-established fact that a watched pot never boils, Kotakuite Neo Deus tells us.
"So I figured a solid racing stripe should solve the dilemma by making the water boil faster. Unfortunately, my initial math didn't work out, as I soon learned that NEVER x FASTER = NEVER (still). This makes me a sad - and slow - chef."
What's going on? We're giving away a copy of Xbox 360 game Race Pro.
Racing stripes make race cars go faster. Face it, they do. Just look at Race Pro's box art. Here's the contest: Put racing stripes on something - anything*!
Racing stripes on a phone? It goes faster. Racing stripes on a cat? It goes faster. Racing stripes on a mop? That's right, it goes faster. On a lawn gnome?
Jedijoe9 writes, "Most things are too damn fast already. But not lawn gnomes."
Entries must be 807 pixels wide and in JPEG format. There needs to be a Kotaku sign in the photo as well. Please send entries to kotakucontestATgmailDOTcom.
Winner gets a copy of Race Pro. Losers get INTERNET FAME. Contest ends this Sunday.
*Note: You actually have to put stripes on something - Photoshop doesn't count!