There were doubts whether Simon Peter's mysterious Centaurian could live up to its debut trailer. Having now played the game, those doubts have been hacked to pieces by a giant purple dildo.

Centaurian plays a bit like Canabalt. If Canabalt was a gay Viking whose two favourite things in the world were Pitfall and Iron Maiden. Your player is constantly running left-to-right across the screen, and all you have to do is jump or roll to avoid obstacles, and attack, which involves throwing a glittery blue boomerang/sex toy at centaurs. Centaurs throwing giant purple dildos at you.

It's a particular brand of humour on display, so if what I've described above sounds offensive in any way, when the game is eventually released, it'll be best to avoid it. And yes, I just said "eventually released". What I played was a beta. A beta for a joke flash game. So awesome.


You can keep up with Centaurian at the game's site, below.