Welcome to "Backhanded Box Quotes," a collection of super pissed-off user reviews from people just like you! Whoa, whoa, don't take that personal.
This week, Backhanded Box Quotes looks at four video games which all committed the unpardonable sin of releasing in the past two weeks.
SSX
Released: Feb. 28
Critic: Mensrea (Metacritic)
• "If they cut any more corners, there would be nothing left. No splitscreen, no skiing?! WTF."
• "I hope the man who created this game burns in hell."
Score: 2
Asura's Wrath
Released: Feb. 21
Critic: Meph (Metacritic).
• "It's some kind of an interactive japanese anime with some short and poor session of play between them."
• "i hate qte, it's not fun and prevent us to really appreciate the story.... and above all they have no impact on how the stroy evolve, it's just scoring"
• "... very boring, allways the same session of playing that includes poor railshooting, beat'em all and boss fight that you can resume in dodging until the small weakness window allow to hit him."
Score: 3
SoulCalibur V
Released: Jan. 31.
Critic: Bowlmbiri (Metacritic)
• "Single Playing sucks as bad as the arcade game AMY, it is not challenging and does not have anything new or entertaining..."
Score: 4
NeverDead
Released: Jan. 31
Critic: MaxxSwan13 (Metacritic)
• "All the reviewers and critics who give this game a bad score are retards."
• "This game is f*cking awesome."
• "So hardcore and fun."
Score: 10
Backhanded Box Quotes will be an occasional feature of Kotaku's Anger Management hour, unless it isn't.