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Admit It, You've Always Wanted To Use A Dildo On A Zombie

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Lemme tell ya, I have, that game was called "my third marriage." Hey-oooo! But seriously folks, the ESRB summary for Dead Rising 2's DLC mentions a wieldable sex toy. I thought that was the paddlesaw! Bang, pow, zoom ...

Per the ESRB on Dead Rising 2: Case West: "One game area-a lounge with neon 'XXX' and 'Love' signs on the walls-depicts a 'massager' item shaped like a sex toy; players can use the item to strike zombies and human characters."

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Alright. I'm gonna combine that with the foam finger and a car battery and now I've got THE SUPER SHOCKER ... Kidding. Dunno if you can do that. Doubt you can. Maybe you can strap a grenade to it for "THE BIG O"? The mind reels.

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Dead Rising 2: Case West will be an Xbox 360-only download starring Frank West, the protagonist of the original Dead Rising. Its release date has yet to be given. Tip your waitress, she's workin' hard out there, thank you sweetie.

Editor's Note: Well, that's not the first time I've bombed a joke. Probably won't be the last. The dildo is available in the main game. I'm leaving this up so as not to insult your intelligence by making a mistake disappear. Sorry gang. But feel free to talk about the undead and dildos.

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Dead Rising 2: Case West [ESRB]