Because official screenshots wouldn’t dare get us this close to Jeff Goldblum’s majestic virtuosity, there is Theater mode.

Giving players free access to gameplay footage and virtual camera controls is nothing new—games that pride themselves on their visual flair have been letting players show off their stuff for years. Perhaps one day it will be a standard feature in all 3D games.

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In Call of Duty: Black Ops III, any online multiplayer match you participate in is available for download and replay. That includes Zombies matches...

...and regular competitive multiplayer.

Once the data is downloaded you you hop into the match and let it play through from multiple angles. First-person and third-person are fine, but free camera is where it’s at.

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Free camera lets you wander all about the map, seeing who is doing what where and when. Fast forward, skip backwards or pause whenever you want. Then spend 20 minutes finding the perfect angle.

The Theater feature isn’t just for making pretty pictures.

You can make pretty videos too.

But beyond that you can analyze your multiplayer performance to see where you made mistakes, how the enemy was tracking your movements, and why you probably shouldn’t have tried competitive multiplayer in the first place because you suck.

This is a person I was shooting at. Note the lack of blood or any signs of pain. This is because I shoot like a Pulp Fiction miracle and everybody knows it.

I mainly use the Theater mode to admire the game’s visuals.

Not only is this character an attractive fellow, he has stuff to read on his armor.

Shiny!

I’m not obsessed with this guy. As one of four initial unlockable Specialists, he just shows up everywhere.

So that’s where Skullomania ended up.

I was playing this character. She is disgusted by this.

Was that Goldblum close-up not close enough for you?

Neal Mcdonough, or as my coworkers called him in last night’s Zombies session, “that boring guy.”

The facial hair is definitely not boring.

Heather Graham could use some lower dental work.

As could this guy.

And a bonus shot explaining how Totilo, Hamilton and I fared in last night’s Zombies session.

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I expect Black Ops III’s Theater feature to be a source of never-ending amusement over the next couple of months.

To contact the author of this post check the alley floor, write to fahey@kotaku.com or find him on Twitter @bunnyspatial.