You Know What Video Games Need? More Wise, Witty, and Lecherous Old Men

Illustration for article titled You Know What Video Games Need? More Wise, Witty, and Lecherous Old Men

Commenter Paradox Me believes there's plenty of room in video games for more wise, experienced, and humorously nostalgic old men, leading the charge or just kicking back and telling us all about how Speak Up on Kotaku was better when they were kids.

Video games need more old-timers, like the three gentlemen you see to the left. Tellah (Final Fantasy IV), Galuf Halm Baldesion (Final Fantasy V) and Cyan Garamonde (Final Fantasy VI).

Why, you ask? For starters, their mere presence is a breath of fresh air. Our games are chock-full of pretty boys and gruff young sprouts, so it's a nice change of pace to see someone who's getting up there in years tagging along, pulling their own weight, showing these whippersnappers how things are done. It's almost inspiring, really.


Secondly, they usually serve some very important roles. The first being balancing the story/character development. Young characters in games are often egotistical, overconfident and quick to take action. They could stand to learn a thing or two from their more experienced comrades. More games could benefit from introducing a voice of reason.

The other role is equally important in my humble opinion: comic relief. Who doesn't get a chuckle out of the lecherous old man, or carefree drunkard? Perhaps recurring ramblings of how they did things "back in my day" or jokes about their memory starting to go. I know, it sounds horribly generic, but timing and context are everything!

So yeah, more capable old folks in games please!

About Speak Up on Kotaku: Our readers have a lot to say, and sometimes what they have to say has nothing to do with the stories we run. That's why we have a forum on Kotaku called Speak Up. That's the place to post anecdotes, photos, game tips and hints, and anything you want to share with Kotaku at large. Every weekday we'll pull one of the best Speak Up posts we can find and highlight it here.

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Gaming also needs more of this. Strong, mature female characters are almost entirely absent from games. We need fewer buxom babes that spend the entire game nearly naked, and more mature, rough, ironclad females.

By that same token, we also need stories that don't merely fall into black and white, good vs. evil nonsense. By having a "villain" in MGS 3 that wasn't necessary villainous, Big Boss and the player questioned their own motives and what they were truly fighting for.