This Gamer Girlfriend Advice Sure Seems Patronizing

Illustration for article titled This Gamer Girlfriend Advice Sure Seems Patronizing

Hey world, guess what! There are female gamers. There are also females who are not interested in games. And there are dudes who don't like games, either. SHOCKING, I KNOW.


Yet, there's this: Japanese website Sugoren did a story on nine ways you can get your "beginner gamer girlfriend" to have fun while playing few games. Because the only beginners out there are girls? Here are those ways:

1. Be nice while teaching her how to play.
2. Occasionally lose to her on purpose while playing a versus game.
3. Prepare snacks, drinks, etc.
4. If possible, buy games you can play with her.
5. Every so often, check to make sure she's not getting tired.
6. Laugh off mistakes and don't get angry.
7. Avoid franchises she hasn't played before or doesn't know.
8. If you are having fun and she isn't, stop playing immediately.
9. Clear the difficult parts for her.


Online in Japan, the reaction to this piece on various forums has been largely derisive, with many commenters ironically pointing out that they first need a girlfriend or wondering how they can get one. "Video games are something you play alone," wrote one commenter on popular site Hachima Kikou. "End of story."

The article was written based on a survey female readers of Otome Sugoren took, so there might be shades of truth. But some of these bits of advice are really, really patronizing—to both male readers and their girlfriends. And even if the readers of Otome Sugoren are females, why not spin this out to advice on how to get all non-gamers comfortable?

When I think of the female (or male) friends I have—gamer and non-gamer—the vast majority are relatively comfortable with video games. They grew up when Nintendo was exploding in popularity, so the notion of video games aren't entirely foreign. Male or female, they might not play current consoles, and honestly, I'm really not convinced it would be wise to try to coax them into doing so.


But this article isn't about friends, it's about girlfriends, you say. Yes, that's correct. It is. And I know that people want to share their interests with the people they care about. However, if your girlfriend (or boyfriend!) isn't into video games, then she (or he) isn't into games. There's nothing wrong with that and no need to let him or her lose so they'll feign interest in your hobby. More important than getting your loved one to play games with you is hoping they understand and respect your interests. The same should go for how you feel about theirs.

テレビゲーム初心者の彼女と楽しく遊ぶために押さえておきたいこと9パターン [Sugoren]

(Top photo: blanche | Shutterstock)

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Where's the important ones:

10. Pay for all her expenses

11. Buy her jewelry, girls like that.

12. Be 6 feet tall, because that's totally under your control.

13. Have a six figure salary, that's a real turn on.