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When A Classroom Learns About Pokémon

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My daughter is seven, and a few weeks ago her class spent the week choosing a subject to “investigate” (basically write reports on). The teacher might have been hoping they chose something like “nature”, or “factories”, or “history”, but the room of seven-year-old kids did the seven-year-old thing and chose “Pokémon”.

Each kid was tasked with writing about a single Pokémon.

Below, you will find a sample of the results of their investigations.

ARCEUS

What does my Pokemon look like?

He looks like Arceus

What are my Pokemon’s characteristics?

He saves people and he [is] nice.

What does my Pokemon do?

He is a multitype Pokemon.

CHARIZARD

What does my Pokemon look like?

He looks cool. He looks like a dragon that breathes fire.

What are my Pokemon’s characteristics?

He is so powerful and can defeat Pikachu.

What does my Pokemon do?

He is a flamethrower.

MEW

What does my Pokemon look like?

Mew looks like a cat with a [squrm?] tail.

What are my Pokemon’s characteristics?

Mew is a playful Pokemon. Mew is rare too.

What does my Pokemon do?

Mew is called the new species Pokemon. Mew is a psychic type Pokemon.

SYLVEON

What does my Pokemon look like?

She is a fairy Pokemon.

What are my Pokemon’s characteristics?

She is shy sometimes.

What does my Pokemon do?

Cute charm.

And there you have it. I hope you, like the children of this class, were able to learn something today.

It’s easy to look at 2017, extrapolate to the future and be filled with a crushing sense of dread. But remember, amidst all the wreckage, at least some of the kids are all right. Especially the ones who love Arceus.