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The Expendables Gets The 8-Bit Contra Clone It So Richly Deserves

Illustration for article titled The Expendables Gets The 8-Bit Contra Clone It So Richly Deserves

Step into the boots of action stars Jet Li, Sylvester Stallone, and Jason Statham, in an 8-bit Facebook action game based off of their upcoming movie, Contra The Expendables.


You have to like a movie that brings together some of the greatest action heroes of all time into one testosterone-coma-inducing parade of shooting, punching, and kicking, and you have to like The Expendables: The Video Game.

No really, you HAVE to like it, or else you won't be able to play the Facebook application, and while I would say you could just go play Contra instead to get the same vibe, you'd be missing out on a few cute tweaks on the theme and possibly a chance to win movie swag.


I've played the game with Statham and Jet Li so far. Statham throws knives, with a power-up that lets him scatter the knives in three directions. Li gets a bit more complicated, kicking, spinning in the air, and throwing shurikens like there was a sale at Shurikens R' Us.

It's very Contra. Perhaps not as complicated. There are only three levels, and two of those end with you having to kill a trio of guys standing on exploding gas cans, which seems like a silly place to stand. The third ends with a boss fight against some guy who hops around and looks terribly out of place.

Winning the game with all three characters unlocks some sort of special, The Expendables-related thing, and getting a high score on the leaderboards could win you movie swag.

But first, you have to like The Expendables. If you don't, nothing I have to say about the game matters.


The movie will be out in theaters next month.

The Expendables 8-Bit Game [Facebook via The Kartel]

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I know people have told me I'm clearly wrong, but it really irks me that Statham is in this. Like he's really on the same level of all the other action stars in the film(Stallone, Li, Schwarzenegger, Willis, Lundgren and Rourke).