We're not exactly sure what's going on here. There's Game Boy title Super Mario Land, the English language, and a whole lotta what-the-fuck.
It's apparently a Japanese gamer attempting to explain Super Mario Land in English. Also, alcohol might be involved. We just don't know. (But imagine trying to do the same in Japanese!)
Bad monsters, oh my god, good weapon, woooooooooooooooooooooo!