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Mountain Dew Hot Sauce Is Good (In Small Amounts)

Illustration for article titled Mountain Dew Hot Sauce Is Good (In Small Amounts)
Photo: Zack Zwiezen

A few weeks ago I got an email from some folks at Mountain Dew. They wanted to send me something. I was intrigued. I said sure, send it my way. A few days later I found a small box on my doorstep and inside was Mountain Dew-infused hot sauce.

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My first thought was simply “Oh no. What is this?” A little searching around on the web and I discovered that this was a special product that Mountain Dew sends people, mostly influencers, for reasons that I assume have to do with marketing and growing your brand. I don’t know. This seems like an odd way to do either, but then again, I’m writing a blog about it so... I guess it worked!

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Photo: Zack Zwiezen
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And yes, to be completely clean and transparent: I was sent this strange product for free from Mountain Dew. However, I won’t allow their “gift” to alter my words or thoughts.

So yeah, Mountain Dew hot sauce is not something you can go out and buy at your local store. At least not yet. Sorry. Instead, this is a special little product for weirdos like me on the internet. Most of its heat comes from habanero peppers. How does it taste? That’s what you are asking right now, I know, I can read your mind. (Also some of you are asking “Why?” and I don’t have an answer for you.)

First I dabbed a bit on my finger and tried it and the taste was mild. I thought I could detect a hint of lemon and lime, but I wasn’t sure. A bigger dab revealed that this hot sauce has a decent bit of kick, but I still didn’t get much of the flavor.

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Photo: Zack Zwiezen
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Our next step: Put it on food. My girlfriend and I made some burritos and I filled one of the burritos with this strange hot sauce and it tasted good! Seriously. The sauce added this spicy citrus kick to the chicken. But it didn’t taste very much like Mountain Dew. So I grabbed another burrito and put a lot of Mountain Dew hot sauce on it. A lot. It dripped off the burrito a bit and onto my hand. My girlfriend looked concerned, but there was no turning back. I took a big bite of the burrito, which was now drenched in Mountain Dew hot sauce.

Confusion and regret are the words I would use to describe my reaction. That amount of sauce was enough to make my burrito taste like a hot cup of spicy Mountain Dew soda, with chicken, beans, and cheese mixed in for good measure. As I tried to wrap my brain around what I had just eaten, the heat started to build in my mouth. You see, I had forgotten that we already had added hot sauce to these burritos. So I had just consumed a lot of heat in one bite and it all tasted like a soda.

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I gagged. I coughed. I finished my bite. But I learned a lesson. When eating Moutain Dew hot sauce, moderation is key.

If you find yourself in possession of some of this stuff, learn from my mistake. A bit is fine, a bit more is great. But too much and you’ll be regretting your choice quickly.

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Kotaku Weekend Editor | Zack Zwiezen is a writer living in Kansas. He has written for GameCritics, USgamer, Kill Screen & Entertainment Fuse.

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DISCUSSION

monsterinmypocket
Monster in My Pocket

I love when people are telling a story and have to bring up their boyfriend/girlfriend, despite them really having nothing to do with the story. They’ll deny it forever, but it’s very much a “I have a girlfriend! Isn’t that cool?” move.