Lego set 60335, a “Train Station” for the Lego City line, is not the first in the company’s history to ship with some kind of poop. It is, however, the first to ship with an enormous pile of human shit that is clogging up a toilet.
The Train Station actually includes three separate components: the station itself, a bus, and a small orange truck that’s towing a trailer. The station and bus are totally fine and without incident, both shining examples of Lego’s utopian ideals of public transport and modern, accessible architecture.
The truck, however, is towing something. A porta-potty. And it doesn’t matter how utopian the rest of Lego’s design ideals are, a porta-potty is a porta-potty, so in the interests of realism this one is full of human shit. Take a look at this part of the instruction manual, which has blown up after being shared by Louie Mantia, Jr.:
Now, like I said, this is not the first time Lego has put poop in its sets! This particular piece, first introduced in 2019 and officially known as “53119: Plate Round 1 x 1 Swirled Top”, has been most frequently used as two things: the top half of a cupcake with chocolate icing, and as animal poop (perhaps most famously in a New York City trashcan). I have no concerns about either of those.
Here, though, I have concerns. Firstly, why? Why is he dragging this around? Why couldn’t the guy—included because he’s doing maintenance work on the building—just use the train station? Surely it has a bathroom? It feels like someone at Lego just really wanted to make a porta-potty with poop in it, because they thought it was funny, and if so, OK, I get it, because it is funny.
Secondly, the idea this poor minifig is having to lug around a porta-potty with a big ol’ human turd sloshing around in it makes me feel worse for him than I have ever felt for a minifig’s job in my life. And that’s saying something, considering loads have been designed purely to be killed in battle.
Thirdly, the scale of everything is way off, and it’s gross. That happens a lot in Lego, I know, but this scenario is really making me think about it. That shit fills the toilet! Imagine a shit that fills your entire toilet bowl! A giant chocolate cupcake is a good thing. A human turd that reaches up to your kneecaps is not.
Helpfully, Mantia didn’t just share the booklet (this set only recently released and has already sold out, because that’s what happens to nice LEGO sets in 2022), but took some video of himself...assembling the toilet.
If this is the direction the company is headed, I can’t wait to turn this into a series with further blogs like “New York Subway Lego Set Is Covered In Piss.”