
While I'm not too keen on Final Fantasy: All the Bravest's copious amounts of in-app purchases and incredibly basic gameplay, a quick flip through the game's character, enemy and weapons collection pages is good for a fair amount of giggles, possibly even a guffaw or two.
Take the basilisk, for instance. If my mother had known I was sitting in my bedroom getting stoned after school I probably wouldn't have wound up in my current profession. I suspect drug testing is not mandatory for video game text translators.
Let's tip-toe through the collection and see what other hilarity ensues.

The dreaded wardrobe malfunction.

Who doesn't?

It's only a flesh wound.

Stupid Blood Lance, draining lives.

What, that isn't normal feline behavior?

That, or a quarter of the people at every anime convention I've ever attended.

Bow down!

Leaving this one alone.

You can't cut corners with poison, people.

Likely written by a doe-eyed high-schooler.

What else are you supposed to do with it?

Just some guy, you know?

I've had lousy luck with the premium character store.
DISCUSSION
Still not as awesome as Lunar's weapon and item descriptions.