Illustration for article titled I Am A Terrible Winner At iGame Of Thrones/i

So last night, I was playing Game of Thrones. A six-player game, an absolute epic, which took almost six hours to finish (there was a lot of combat).


Playing as the Lannisters, I spent nine of the game's ten turns hovering between 3-4th place. Out of the running, under the radar. Exactly where you want to be in this game when the end draws near.


On my very last turn, the "winner" (playing as Greyjoys) was already celebrating his "triumph". He'd been my ally all game long, and had used me as a buffer against the southern armies while he went about conquering the north. With a two-castle lead and barely any moves left, he thought he had the game wrapped up. He'd also forgotten what game this was.

I used my last turn to split a large army, send it across two water regions and take two of his castles. This shot me from 4th to 1st, with nobody else having moves remaining to counter me. I win.

The room falls silent. Not even a chuckle, or a whisper. I smile, reach over to the stereo, and press "play" on my phone.

Then I walk out, and get a beer.

I am a bad winner, but fuck it, you can only win bad in Game of Thrones.

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