The biggest challenge in Micro, the “fun” multiplayer map in Call of Duty: Black Ops III’s final batch of downloadable content, is pulling yourself away from the massive cupcakes and copious amounts of alcohol long enough to shoot other people.

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Luckily it’s easy enough to create a custom game where you can explore the over-sized backyard barbecue to your heart’s content. I’ve even imagined my own narrative for the map. It’s called “Mommy and Daddy are Drinking and Fighting Again.”

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How else does one explain the lack of giant people crowding what’s got to be the most well-stocked picnic table ever? We’ve got half-eaten food . . .

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. . . copious amounts of alcohol . . .

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. . . and the burner is still on under the food tray. That’s a dead giveaway right there.

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Whatever happened to cause the barbecue to be abandoned, be it a zombie outbreak or dad spending too much time flirting with our young, single next-door neighbor, it’s a real shame. Everything looked so good.

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They even had cake!

I’m a huge fan of multiplayer maps that allow players to run about as tiny people in a much larger world. I’d say I am as much a fan of micro-sized maps as someone at Treyarch is of beer kegs, because they obviously studied the inside of a beer keg very closely for this map.

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The level of detail is outstanding, from the scratched and scuffed metal around the rim of the keg, to the foam texture inside the pool noodle.

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Well done!

The Micro map is part of Black Ops III’s Salvation map pack, the final batch of downloadable content before Infinite Warfare takes over. It’s available this week on PlayStation 4, with the PC and Xbox One to follow in the coming weeks. There should be many more ants and flies by then.

Kotaku elder, lover of video games, keyboards, toys, snacks, and other unsavory things.

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