Some guys ponder the Roman Empire. I prefer to think about what Achilles meant when he encountered Odysseus in the underworld and told him he’d rather have lived a slave than died a hero. I’m not a history buff, but I have a massive affection for ancient Greek history and literature. Christopher Nolan directing an adaptation of The Odyssey should be slam dunk for me. So why am I so worried?
The movie only recently started filming and is still more than a year away, but each little detail that leaks out from the production makes me do a Kombucha meme spit-take. The excellent tactician Odysseus, who famously broke the years-long siege of Troy with a maneuver so brilliant its now a staple of the English language and a famous condom brand, played by Matt “How ‘bout them apples?” Damon? The Bostonian’s period work has not been encouraging. A Bronze Age ostentatious warrior dressed in drab grey and brown garb? Another goddamn Spartan helmet? I mean, come on.
I’m not nerd who comments in YouTube threads about historical accuracy, but these choices all strike me as ranging from boring to bizarre. The latest of these headscratchers comes via leaked set pics that show Nolan on board a ship with Tom Holland who looks like he’s ready to throw the One Ring into Mt. Doom. A movie filmed out at sea instead of inside a warehouse in front of a green screen? Yay! A Greek epic taking place onboard a Viking ship? Huh...
Not to get all “Greek Trireme vs. Viking Longboat” History channel on you, but I have played enough Assassin’s Creed to know the difference. In fact, the boat in question appears to be the Draken Harald Hårfagre, Norway’s largest modern Viking-style ship, which reportedly left for Greece earlier this year. Look, it’s a cool-looking boat and movies are fake, but even my 37-year-old dad brain that still randomly sends the group chat Inception memes at 7:00 a.m. in the morning is starting to get worried.
It’s hard not to get the sense that Nolan is playing fast-and-loose with one of the foundational texts of the Western Cannon. And not in a bonkers imaginative way either, but in an, “Oppenheimer made $1 billion and no one is ever telling me what to do again,” kind of way. Or maybe this really is part of some wild reinterpretation of The Odyssey and Odysseus’ son Telemachus, seemingly played by Tom Holland, just happens to run into some Vikings on his quest to find his lost father. Maybe there is time travel. Maybe this whole thing is a meta-commentary on people paying way too much attention to leaked Hollywood set photos. I hope so. I want so bad for The Odyssey to be so good. At least Jon Bernthal looks incredible.
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