Best: The Sims 4

Let me take you on a little journey. Spark up that joint and boot up The Sims. Spend way too long poring over the Create-A-Sim screen in an attempt to make someone who vaguely looks like the first girl you had a crush on. Did she have shoulder-length ashy brown hair or was it a bit longer, a bit warmer? Was her nose ring on her left or right nostril? Would she wear those boots? After you’ve finally settled on a satisfying avatar of the person you were too scared to come out to, pick a lovely neighborhood for her to move into—she deserves it, as she’s definitely probably married to some fucker named Steve who took over his dad’s plumbing company.

Input the motherlode cheat and give her unlimited funds, then before she can step a combat-booted toe into the mediocre house on the property, swap into build mode and demolish the fucker. She can stay there, frozen in glee at the thought of entering her new home, for as long as you need while you build her a house worthy of Frank Lloyd Wright.

Build its skeleton, get lost in the vision. Snap walls into place just to remove them with a satisfying thud. Rotate furniture this way and that to get the perfect angle. Play with lighting. Make a bathroom inspired by that one you saw in Architectural Digest’s tour of David Harbour’s New York apartment. Meticulously paint cobblestones onto the terrain, dot those cobblestones with wildflowers. Look up a YouTube video on how to make a conversation pit, because you want this space to give The Nice Guys, to offer ‘70s mid-century exceptionalism. Make it feel lived-in with an endless array of tchotchkes: a fruit bowl, a tissue box, shoes near the front door. Renovate half the space because you think it feels too much like a display room at Ikea. Don’t forget to build out the yard, she needs a pool. You have been doing this for four hours.