Backhanded Box Quotes: "Metacritic Reviews Are Often Avenues for Trolling"

Illustration for article titled Backhanded Box Quotes: Metacritic Reviews Are Often Avenues for Trolling

Welcome to "Backhanded Box Quotes," a collection of super pissed-off user reviews from people just like you! Whoa, whoa, don't take that personal.

This week's scan of proportionate reactions to entertainment products includes condemnation for something almost universally acclaimed and a scalding appraisal of a football video game from EA Sports that is not named Madden.


UEFA Euro 2012

Released: April 24
Critic: Frazzi (Metacritic).

"Lets also ignore the fact that Metacritic user reviews are often avenues for trolling."


"Be smarter than me and not waste your money on this absolutely cynical release from EA. "
Score: 3.

Critic: uk_friday (Metacritic).

"EA clearly have committed suicide with this product and heads should roll."

"Players disappear from your squad during the tournament and new players arrive ... Did they miss the plane? Did they just go home and sulk?"
Score: 1.

Prototype 2

Released: April 24
Critic: Prototype 2 (Metacritic).
"As I learned from Mass Effect 3's review, the ending is everything, have you seen this game's ending? the ending was terrible!!!"


"It all builds up to a Final Epic Battle of simple quick-time events"
Score: 1.


Released: April 20
Critic: eastrazor (Metacritic).

"**** **** **** ! Boring"

"**** for kids !"

"I fought that it will be funn or even hard but this is game for not too smart kids."
Score: 0.


Backhanded Box Quotes will be an occasional feature of Kotaku's Anger Management hour, unless it isn't.

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I just feel bad for developers like Obsidian who get their bonuses linked to an fing aggregate score's so stupid, and Zenimax sucks for that. It's nice to see a general outlook on how a game's received, but take it with a damn grain of salt. Score reviews in general tell you crap about a game, it's the content in a review that gives good feedback, and even then some reviewers inflate or hate for dumb reasons.

Then the consumer reviews on metacritic, look at the crap they slung at Mass Effect 3, as if a game ending determines the quality of the ENTIRE product.