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CultureTotal RecallThere was Once a U.S. National Video Game Team, and This Guy Was Its Captain
A leader of a national team of athletes could reasonably expect to make a few endorsements or appearances, and in his day, Donn Nauert had his. Whether supplying a pro’s advice on Gradius or judging a video gaming triathlon, the captain of the U.S. National Video Game Team offered confidence, rectitude and, of course, a…
By Owen Good -
Backhanded Box Quotes: ‘A Dance Central Rip-Off’
Welcome to “Backhanded Box Quotes,” a collection of super pissed-off user reviews from people just like you! Whoa, whoa, don’t take that personal. Not much to tackle this week, but in video games, there is always something to complain about. Let’s look at a couple of games, one not everyone loved, and another just about…
By Owen Good -
Hitler Recaps the Week in Video Gaming
Godwin’s Law states that “as an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1.” As basically all video game discussion takes place online, let’s just cut to the chase and give der fuehrer’s take on recent topics of interest to gamers. Hitler Is Informed That The Godfather 2…
By Owen Good -
Trademarking a Dragon Shout May Be a Good Thing
There I stood, before the Greybeards, ready to learn the truth of my existence as a Dragonborn. Einarth stared down at the floor, and thus spake “Ro.” Strange runes glowed upon the stones at my feet. The last one looked like ™. If ZeniMax Media is going to trademark a thu’um—in this case, the most…
By Owen Good -
Biff Tannen Predicts (Another) Riot in Vancouver
Hey, are you a sports fan on the go? Who has time these days to watch the big game, or bother with messy DVR, or boring highlight shows? With Biff Tannen’s Sports Almanac, we’ll give you the weekend’s biggest matchups before they happen, thanks to these highly accurate peer-reviewed scientific simulations of sports video gaming’s…
By Owen Good -
Xbox 360 Controllers Pay the Ultimate Price for Missed Perfection
Now two weeks into Major League Baseball 2K12‘s $1,000,000 Perfect Game Challenge, nearly 275 verified perfect games have been thrown, out of more than 400,000 attempted, according to 2K Sports. Which means, potentially, hundreds of thousands of controllers, discs and maybe even consoles have been hurled, too. That’s a far less dignified response than T.J.…
By Owen Good -
Borderlands 2 Will Get a New Character Class—Don’t Worry, She’s Not a Preorder Exclusive [Updated]
In a panel at PAX East, Gearbox Software just revealed that Borderlands 2 will add a new class—the “Mechromancer” sometime after the game releases this October. The class is in the conceptual stages only and will be developed once the game goes into its certification stages later this year. Concept art for the character was…
By Owen Good -
Culture
Finally, it’s Fez
Downloadable titles highlight the week’s new releases, including Skullgirls, World Gone Sour and, at long last, Fez. Tuesday • Skullgirls (PSN) • World Gone Sour (PSN) Wednesday • Legend of Grimrock (PC) • Skullgirls (XBLA) • World Gone Sour (XBLA) • The Splatters (XBLA) Thursday • Tribes: Ascend (PC) • Men of War: Condemned Heroes…
By Owen Good -
OK, So, This is a Rather Horrible Story Out of Korea
Straight from Korea, we have a story that seems to meld all the most awful components of video game stories that hit the mainstream media: Gaming addiction, an Internet cafe, a neglectful mother, and a dead baby in a dumpster. Reports koreaBANG, a woman at a PC gaming cafe in Seoul (where they’re called PC…
By Owen Good -
Rumor: The Wii U has $180 Worth of Parts, Won’t Be Sold Under $300
The closer we get to E3, when the Wii U seen there is expected to be the finished product, you can expect rumors on this machine to increase commensurately. Here’s another one. The Wii U’s parts will cost about $180, with roughly $50 of that going to the controller. That’s according to the unidentified sources…
By Owen Good -
Is This How You Roll in Skyrim, Too?
Look, a hilarious and well-done Skyrim video that also does not reference wounded joints or fus ro dah! They do exist, you know, and now there’s another—an outstanding goof on looting dead bodies, sometimes before they hit the ground, sometimes before they’re even dead bodies. The video is by Michael Shanks and Sam McCabe; the…
By Owen Good -
Skimpy Outfit Gets Lollipop Chainsaw Cosplayer Asked to Change Or Leave PAX Show Floor
Word is that Jessica Nigri, a big-time cosplayer hired to portray the protagonist of Lollipop Chainsaw, was asked to leave the PAX East show floor yesterday. Why, you ask? Oh, I don’t know. Maybe that hot pink jumpsuit with a “neckline” plunging to her crotch has something to do with it. She’s back today (here…
By Owen Good -
Another Four Assassin’s Creed III Screens Tumble Out, Showing Gameplay
From whence these came originally, your guess is as good as mine, but if Ubisoft is trying to keep screens of Assassin’s Creed III secret, they’re doing a poor job. Three of these screenshots depict Connor sneaking around a battlefield as Yanks and Redcoats trade fire. You get a look at the game’s HUD for…
By Owen Good -
Inflata-Tank Commander
You’re gonna have to put on your thinking cap for this one. That’s an inflatable tank, a prop spied at PAX East 2012. Its purpose is unknown. Its capabilities likewise have not been analyzed. That’s where you guys are going to take over. I mean, come on, inflatable toys make for awesome girlfriends ‘Shop Contests,…
By Owen Good -
Weekend Talk Amongst Yourselves
Happy Easter. For those who observe the holiday, hope the good bunny left you a basket full of candy and you recovered all the eggs he dispersed in the yard. Good morning, and welcome to Weekend Talk Amongst Yourselves. Today’s image comes to us courtesy of, who else, The Real Pan1da7. You, too, can be…
By Owen Good -
Culture
Sunday Comics: You Kiss Your Mother With That Mouth?
Welcome to your Sunday read of the week’s best in web comics. Make sure to click on the expand button in the bottom right to enlarge each comic. Nerf NOW!! by Josué Pereira published April 6.—Read more of Nerf NOW!! Awkward Zombie by Katie Tiedrich published April 2.—Read more of Awkward Zombie Penny Arcade by…
By Owen Good -
Lamborghini Bat-Shop: The Winners
Does the Batmobile have license plates? No? Does it even need them? The hell with it. A kind-hearted car enthusiast from Maryland supplied the basis for our latest ‘Shop. and we have 20 winners, plus overall winner RobotMoses! I love what you did to East Tremont! Totilo and I both had to read The Power…
By Owen Good -
The Cosplay of PAX East: Day Two
No way, Hannibal, I ain’t gettin’ on no plane with a crazy fool who don’t look at this gallery of cosplayers at Penny Arcade Expo East. This is the second day roundup of cosplayers at the year’s first big fan-attended show. We will have more tomorrow, so check back then!
By Owen Good
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