A Lighthearted Look at Games' Light-in-the-Loafers Moments

Full-blown Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon here. This week I learned the cornermen in Ring King weren't giving the boxers blowjobs, they were changing their cups. Then Current TV mentions the same thing in this hilarious look at gay representation in video games.

Host Bryan Safi doesn't uncover much that we haven't heard before (Bully is four years old; the gay sex in Demon Tits Dragon Age is well documented.) But sometimes a joke is funnier when told on one's self. And the video's absolutely worth staying with until the end.


Just one question, though: Who the fuck changes cups in the middle of a goddamn boxing match?! And not only that, changing cups is so urgent it must be done in full view of everyone?! What, he's getting hit in the jewels repeatedly? Enough to dent the thing? Is it itchy or something? Every time I've seen corner work the fighter sits down, swishes some water, spits in a bucket and, if his face looks like eggplant, gets pressed and swabbed. Maybe even cut, if we're lucky.

Here's the only mention I've ever read of a guy handling another boxer's package, and this is before a fight. And it's Buster Douglas and his dad.

Only his dad knew what it was to find yourself standing in a locker room three minutes before a fight with your bladder full and your crotch in a cup and your hands tied up inside a pair of eight-ounce gloves. Only his dad could reach down without hesitating and take care of it, the way he had done for Buster before another bout in '85.

Gary Smith, "The Fight of His Life" Sports Illustrated Oct. 22, 1990.

Those dudes are totally blowing the boxers, is what I am saying.

Video: Video Games Are Gay [Gay Gamer, thanks VS]


Fernando Jorge

You know what I think games need, they need to define a character's sexuality. In these games that you have freedom to choose who you are and what you do, NPCs won't have sexual orientation, they'll just screw you if they like you. It'd be nice if each character's sexuality was fixed, just like other traits.