To: Ashcraft
From: Faheycraft
Re: Who Said Packing Was Fun? You? How Dare You...craft.

I've been reminded three times in the past week that I have a birthday a week from today, and each time I've managed to forget the fact completely moments after. Didn't birthdays used to be fun? Remember back when you were a child and a month or two before your birthday you'd start coming up with lists of things you wanted from your parents? Each day would pass so very slowly, anticipation growing inside your tiny body with each passing moment. The day before your birthday you were a thrumming bundle of potential energy, ready to unwrap the living hell out of anything put in front of you.

Now birthdays sneak up on me like a ninja. Every once in awhile a friend or family member points them out to me - "Hey Mike, isn't that a ninja?" - but when I turn my head it's disappeared. Then the day finally dawns, and the ninja raises its sword over my head, and I turn around and totally stab it in the gut with a pair of sai, Raphael ninja turtle style. I'm not letting a f***ing ninja sneak up on me, even if it is for the sake of a good allegory. *spits on ninja corpse*

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