Every Pokemon is interesting and worth talking about. I don’t play a ton of Pokemon, but I do enjoy the universe and I love learning more about the creatures in it. So, Here’s Another Pokemon! It’s Zoroark!
Average Height: 5‘03“
Average Weight: 187.8 lbs.
First Added In Generation V
It sounds like a living nightmare to live in the Pokemon universe. So many Pokemon will attack you, steal your kids, gross you out or worse. Zoroark is another Pokemon to add to the list of creatures that make that world so terrible. According to Pokedex entries on Bulbapeida, this wolf-like Pokemon can create mental illusions that look so real, people and other creatures will run away in fear.
These Pokemon live in large groups and use this mind-altering ability to protect their dens. If a hunter, trainer or dangerous Pokemon gets too close they can use illusions, like giant Pokemon, to scare them away. These illusions are extremely realistic and can even fool cameras. This doesn’t really make a lot of sense, but it also sounds crazy as hell. Could this creature start adding creepy or weird things into random YouTube or Facebook videos?
“I don’t remember a giant-floating-head-of-a-horse that is spitting slime originally being in this Let’s Play I recorded...”
Zoroark can’t actually change its physical form, but it can trick other creatures and people into thinking it has. Which is honestly just as useful. It can even change into a human and in while using a human illusionary form it can even talk in English. This seems to be glossed over by Pokemon and Bulbapedia, but this seems like an incredibly powerful and creepy ability. How do people live their daily lives in this world?
Another fun trick this Pokemon will pull on people is putting illusions in their mind that will make them wander around the woods endlessly. The Pokedex entry doesn’t say they walk around confused until dying of starvation, but it also doesn’t say they leave the woods. My tip to residents and visitors: Stay away from this furry looking fox-thing. It is messed up.
Hey, so I don’t want to kink shame or be mean to anyone, but boy you can find a lot of furry porn involving this Pokemon on the internet. Again, I don’t mind, you do you. However, it made it really tough to find safe-for-work fan art this week. I hope this is actually safe. Are apples a sex thing to some people? I don’t know. I don’t want to know. I’m sorry. Let’s move on.
- This was one of the very first generation V Pokemon creatures revealed to the public, being first teased in February 2010.
- According to one Pokedex entry, this Pokemon has been known to trap people who get too close to its home and then punish them. Call the police.
- One Zoroark can actually trick multiple people at once with their illusions. I imagine a giant group of these creatures could control an entire country. Maybe even the world? Do you think there are people in the Pokemon universe who believe that these Pokemon monsters control the world, like the Illuminati?
Cascoon: the kidney stone pokemon
If Cascoon is the kidney stone Pokemon, who is the hemorrhoid of the Pokemon universe? Diglet?
Next week, another Pokemon gets their moment in the spotlight. If you have any suggestions for future Pokemon I should cover, let me know in the comments below. Also, share any fanart or stories you have about this week’s Pokemon.