Your Guide To This Summer's Movies

Illustration for article titled Your Guide To This Summers Movies

Summertime is more than beaches and barbecues. It's also when Hollywood releases some of its biggest motion pictures. Here's a look at the Hollywood's upcoming summer blockbusters, both good and bad.

SALT - Release Date: 7/23

Angelina Jolie, star of the Tomb Raider movies, does her best cloak and dagger in this espionage thriller. Salt is written by Kurt Wimmer, who was at one time rumored to have been attached to the Metal Gear Solid movie, a project that has since imploded.


THE OTHER GUYS - Release Date: 8/6

The Other Guys is a humorous send-up of the buddy copy flicks. Several of the principals have either done video game voice over work (Samuel L. Jackson voiced Officer Frank Tenpenny in GTA: San Andreas) or has appeared in video games movies (Dwayne Johnson appeared in the 2005 DOOM film and Mark Wahlberg was in the Max Payne). And where did Will Ferrell learn to drive like that?

STEP UP 3-D - Release Date: 8/6

If you get dragged to this movie, god help you, and cannot escape, the horror, just remember that actress Alyson Stoner has voiced Kairi in Kingdome Hearts Re: Chain of Memories, Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days and Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Sleep. Then cry softly in your popcorn.


MIDDLE MEN - Release Date: 8/6

Right now, you are on the internet, leading me to think *maybe* you have seen dirty pictures online. Here's the story of the guy who made that happened. Thank him?


TWELVE - Release Date: 8/6

Rich kid depravity! Super drugs! Reports are that this movie is a stinker. Even 50 Cent, who has game credits in 50 Cent: Blood in the Sand and Modern Warfare 2, couldn't save it.



It's...Scott Pilgrim! Go see it! Multiple times!

THE EXPENDABLES - Release Date: 8/13

Did you miss the 80s or do you miss the 80s? Director Sylvester Stallone has assembled some of the biggest action stars ever for his men-on-a-mission film. Aside: one of the stars, Jason Statham, appeared in Uwe Boll's 2007 film, In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale. He also did voice work in the first Call of Duty game.


PIRANHA 3D - Release Date: 8/20

Directed by the guy who did the Hills Have Eyes remake, Piranha 3D has piranhas and its in 3D. If that's not enough to see it, the movie has Christopher Lloyd from Back to the Future. That should do it!


TAKERS - Release Date: 8/27

This trailer screams "poor man's Michael Mann", but we can't all be Heat. What can you do!


THE LAST EXORCISM - Release Date: 8/27

Boy, oh boy, does this look creepy! Shot in a realistic, documentary style, the flick is produced by Eli Roth of Hostel and Inglorious Basterds fame.



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Eder Campuzano

Sounds like you need to include 'Inception.' And please, for the love of God, let everyone know that sitting through 'The Last Airbender' is worse than being forced to play the Zelda CDi games while being fed week-old Indian food at a Justin Bieber concert. Seriously.

Oh, and that 'Predators' is okay. At least if you like senseless destruction and enjoyed the original.