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Onechanbara Z Kagura on the Xbox 360 is a bucket of over-the-top hilarity complete with swords, chainsaws, zombies, demons, jiggle physics, the jabberwocky, vampires, bikinis, and of course, vampires in bikinis. But nothing exemplifies the core of what Onechanbara Z is better than Kagura's collection of pre-asskicking one-liners.

At the beginning of nearly every boss battle, she strikes a pose and fires one off. Of course, doing this in Japanese just wouldn't be cool enough, so Kagura says her final taunts in Google translate-level "Engrish." The results are as stunning as they are hilarious.


The complete collection of Kagura's one-liners has been posted above for your enjoyment. But as you watch, I invite you to ponder along with me: Are these one-liners really the result of someone with a loose knowledge of grade-school level English and a Japanese/English dictionary? Or—given how much this game embraces its B-grade, Japanese zombie film roots—is it written in terrible Engrish like this on purpose?

Onechanbara Z Kagura was released on January 19, 2012 for the Xbox 360. There are currently no plans for a Western release (and the game is region locked to Japanese consoles).

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