Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam

Hey Squall, did you hear? Your game's on Steam now.

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam
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It's kind of a big deal, dude.

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam

Because now tons of people can buy and play Final Fantasy VIII on their PCs? I mean, you must know what Steam is.

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam
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Okay, sorry! I shouldn't have assumed.

Steam is this big network that lets people buy computer games, earn achievements, share games with their friends. It's run by Valve, the company started by Gabe Newell—

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Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam

You really don't know who Gabe Newell is?

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam
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I mean, I don't really care, I'm just—

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam
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Okay, okay. Let's call timeout here. Can you take a step back and admit that you were being a bit of an asshole just then?

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam
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What? Man, I'm just trying to let you know that your game is on Steam. What's with you?

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam
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Well, I'm sorry to hear that. If it helps, Final Fantasy VIII is pretty good.

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam
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Critics! And fans! I mean, aren't you excited about all the new people who will get to experience your game?

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam
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Why?

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Very funny. I thought you might be psyched about your audience expanding, that's all.

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What, you mean Square Enix? I mean, I know they've got some awful business practices, but I don't think they're that bad...

Illustration for article titled Squall Reacts To emFinal Fantasy VIII/em On Steam
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:(

Random Encounters is a weekly column dedicated to all things JRPG. It runs every Friday at 3pm ET. You can reach Jason at jason@kotaku.com or on Twitter at @jasonschreier.

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