What makes a Super Smash Bros. character annoying? It’s a very specific cocktail of repetitive, invulnerabile, low-effort or spammy moves that, together, make you want to throw your controller at the television.
Everybody has that one Smash fighter they hate playing against. But one thing I realized after setting out to list the top ten annoying Smash characters is that, in their own way, every Smash character is annoying: characters who are too over-powered are annoying; characters whose moves are inescapable are annoying; characters who can roll across the stage are annoying; characters who have minions are annoying; characters who spam projectiles (and especially when those projectiles make annoying sounds) are annoying; characters whose moves all look the same are annoying; and characters who are Bayonetta are annoying.
Really, that’s most of the characters.
Below, I have ranked all of the Smash 4 characters from least to most annoying in accordance with how obnoxious they are to play against. Although I offer no specific explanations, I have a few notes to offer at the end.
54. Zero Suit Samus
49. Donkey Kong
36. Captain Falcon
35. Mega Man
34. Meta Knight
27. Rosalina & Luma
26. Toon Link
25. Little Mac
24. Dark Pit
22. King Dedede
21. Duck Hunt
16. Bowser Jr.
12. Dr. Mario****
11. Wii Fit Trainer
9. Diddy Kong
5. Mr. Game & Watch
A few notes:*Sheik is not annoying because she is not cheap. Relatedly, I also main her.
**Big, heavy characters with easy-to-anticipate moves tend to be less annoying (i.e. 47-53).
***Fox and Falco just aren’t that annoying anymore. We can all defend against the laser spam. Seriously. It’s 2017.
****I hate the sound of Dr. Mario’s “Megavitamin” move, especially when it’s spammed.
*****Yoshi can eat you, poop you out as an egg and drop you off a cliff while your body helplessly struggles to escape death. It is annoying as hell.
******All of Sonic’s moves look essentially the same. They make essentially the same noise, which is the sound of my cavities getting drilled. He has a move that is just him rolling across the stage, a move type universally considered obnoxious, in part, because it requires little effort and is difficult to avoid. Playing against him is a bad time.