Pokémon. They come in all shapes and sizes, with enough diversity that everyone can find at least one they like. And though it’s difficult to have beef (or pork) with many of them, odds are you’re going to run into a few bad apples when you have over 900 of something. Humans are imperfect, of course, so some misplaced disdain is inevitable, even when it comes to cartoon creatures.
It gives me no pleasure to report there are a handful of Pokémon that should die. I’m not demanding The Pokémon Company kick off some sort of mass extinction event in the upcoming Scarlet and Violet (which may or may not be leaking all over the place), there’s just something about these pocket monsters that makes me think, “I need you to no longer exist.” I can’t really explain it.
Sorry, little dudes, you can’t all be as fantastic as Koffing.
Disclaimer: The opinions expressed above belong entirely to the writer (“Ian Walker”) and do not constitute the views of Kotaku as a whole. The blog is meant as parody and not a legitimate calling for the deaths of any individual Pokémon. Under no circumstances should you take any of this seriously. Like, really, it’s Friday, allow yourself some levity. The world is hard enough as it is. I hope you all have a good weekend.