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The long running Cruis’n racing game series is making its triumphant return with a new arcade game, Cruis’n Blast. While there was a lackluster Cruis’n game that made it to the Wii in 2007, it was a port of a 2004 The Fast and the Furious arcade game. That makes this the first real Cruis’n game since 2001's Cruis’n Velocity on the Game Boy Advance.

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More importantly, the song in the Cruis’n Blast trailer is a hellish nightmare that also might deserve a Grammy.

It’s like someone heard half a pop song from six years ago and then was tasked with writing their own in thirty minutes. The auto-tuning is Cher-esque in its execution. That, combined with an unexpected super deep voice making random asides, turns this into a masterpiece. “Aw yeah,” and “Let’s ride,” indeed, mysterious man! Has his voice been pitched down? Almost certainly!


Given the trailer, the official render of the arcade cabinet is exactly as subtle as one might expect.


The theme song, however, is perfect. If the people who wrote it intended it to sound like that, they would be geniuses. The coup de grace is that it’s ever so slightly off the beat. Not so much that it stops being music, but just enough so that you really notice. Look out for these dulcet tones ringing the halls of a Dave & Busters near you.


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