Meet Korone, the worst possible Nintendog and all-around not-good boy. At Summer Games Done Quick yesterday Nintendogs speedrunner ZooKetra’s early-morning beginner medal run was going just fine until this petulant black lab pup refused to be guided through a simple obstacle-course tunnel.
Prior to Korone’s act of canine disobedience everything was going to plan. ZooKetra and his commentator, fellow Nintendogs speedrunner Mook, were in good spirits for 5:30 a.m. on a Monday morning. ZooKetra picked a Labrador because the breed is supposed to be good at running, jumping, and doing tricks. During a brief getting-to-know-you session involving pet-pets and some basic training, ZooKetra let us in on some Nintendogs speedrunning tricks, such as using words that are easier for the game to understand instead of commands like “sit” and “stay,” or how yanking on the dog’s leash makes it move faster during walks, even if it looks like animal abuse.
Finally, ZooKetra was ready for the agility competition. As long as Korone didn’t miss more than a single jump in the obstacle course, the gold medal would be theirs. To his credit, Korone did not miss a jump. Instead, he got stuck in a tunnel.
Tap as he might, ZooKetra was unable to coax Korone through the tunnel, an obstacle that’s normally nothing more than a formality. The little black pup would go part-way in and then stop, declining to scamper any further. Now and then a virtual puppy will get stuck briefly, costing runners a second or two of precious time, but Korone flat-out refused to go through, forcing ZooKetra to reboot the game and try again with a fresh course. Korone, being the worst Nintendog ever, got stuck again.
A Nintendog getting completely stuck in a tunnel is not a common occurrence. As ZooKetra’s commentator Mook put it, “I’ve run an ungodly amount of this game, like a disgusting amount, and I have legitimately never seen that happen.” For it to happen twice in a single speedrun? That’s called “marathon luck,” something that doesn’t happen unless a couple of thousand people are watching you do it live.
After another reboot, ZooKetra decided to run Korone through the other two competitions, obedience and frisbee catching, before giving the agility course one more try at around the run’s 16:00 mark. Perhaps the frisbee win taught Korone not to fear circular things. Maybe the obedience run taught the puppy an important lesson about listening, dammit. Whichever the case, the third time was the charm for Korone and ZooKetra.
ZooKetra’s final time for the run was 16 minutes, 56 seconds, a very good time despite various setbacks. But the real reward was being able to obliterate Korone from existence by deleting the save once the run was done. You were a bad, bad dog, Korone, and you shall not be missed.