New Xenoblade 2 Patch Gets Rid Of The Game’s Funniest Lines

The Ardainian Soldier enemies in Xenoblade Chronicles 2 had some weird battle cries in the English voice over. These bloodlusty, passionate shrieks tickled the hilarity bones of many players. The latest patch has bashfully edited these clips into more reasonable exclamations. Hear it for yourself in this brief video.

In the version 1.0 English release, the soldiers yelled, “Think you can take me?” and “Don’t forget me!” Their helmets muffled their voices. They screamed as though their thighs were fork-impaled. They sounded mad, and they sounded weird about being mad. They sounded like absolute freaks when you were fighting more than two of them at a time: above the heart-pumping battle theme music, six men repeatedly synchronized screams to “Think you can take me don’t forget me don’t forget think you can take me you’re done!”

The 1.2 patch wholly replaces “Think you can take me?” with “Take this!” Well, that’s banal.

They’ve also clipped the “Me” off of “Don’t forget me!” So now they’re just saying “Don’t forget.” Don’t forget what? The “Don’t forget!” voice sample is clearly the original “Don’t forget me!” voice sample with the “me” clipped off. Those wily localizers thought I wouldn’t notice. Well, they can’t trick me—not after how many thousands of times those soldiers told me not to forget them.

When a soldier says “Take this! Don’t forget!” in close enough succession while pointing his gun at you, it seriously sounds like he’s telling you to take his gun, because he’s worried you’ll need it.

In the video, I also show you the Japanese voices, and try to give you a literal translation of what the soldiers are yelling.

Personally, I’m half-devastated that they removed these voices from the game. They were so funny. The magnitude of their hilarity might have been such that it offset every single one of the bad things Jason Schreier picked apart in his review.

https://kotaku.com/xenoblade-chronicles-2-the-kotaku-review-1820903229

Then again, I played the game with the Japanese voices on.

I made my own videos about Xenoblade Chronicles 2 using an advance copy, so I wasn’t able to enjoy the Japanese voices until the game’s official release and day-one patch. So after capturing footage for my videos, I muted the battle voices. What I’m getting at is, today, while capturing footage for this video, was the first time I heard Tora’s battle voices. Wow, man. Just—wow.

And hey! Watch my videos! I didn’t dislike the game at all. And if you don’t dislike my videos at all, please consider subscribing to our YouTube channel! They’ve promised me one minute of vacation time for every new subscriber we get in 2018! (Note: they actually haven’t.)

https://kotaku.com/xenoblade-chronicles-2-is-a-super-nintendo-game-microw-1820863338

https://kotaku.com/xenoblade-chronicles-2-is-pretty-darn-different-in-japa-1821131255