Every Pokemon is interesting and worth talking about. I don’t play a ton of Pokemon, but I do enjoy the universe and I love learning more about the creatures in it. So, Here’s Another Pokemon! It’s Malamar!
Average Height: 4' 11"
Average Weight: 103.6 lbs.
First Added In Generation VI
I’ve always been fascinated by and a bit creeped out by squids. They look so strange and cool, but they are also extremely smart and can be dangerous. I remember a weird show on Animal Planet suggested that in 200 million years they would evolve to take our place as the smartest animals on the planet. So Malamar is like my feelings on squids recreated in a single creature. It looks wild, it seems dangerous and I’m a bit scared to be around it.
Malamar is a large Pokemon that appears to be an upside-down squid. This seems to be a reference to its evolution. To evolve an Inkay into a Malamar, players must flip over their 3DS. Like Inkay, Malamar also has psychic abilities. But Malamar’s powers are much stronger than its predecessor. In fact, according to information from Bulbapedia, Malamar possesses the strongest hypnotic powers of any known Pokemon. Now to be fair, that’s a hard thing to measure, but if it is true, that would make Malamar one of the most dangerous and powerful creatures in the world.
And Malamar has used this power, but not always for good. One recent Pokedex entry even claims that this giant squid has actually changed the course of history. No specific events or moments are shared, but the idea that this weird squid creature has probably caused a war or two is a weird thing to think about. Is Malamar a war criminal?
In Malamar’s defense, many evil and terrible people have used the creature and its powers to do nefarious things. I mean, I’m not actually sure how that works. Do you just point a gun at a Malamar and say stuff like “Take over the prime minister and tell him to cancel all peace talks.” It seems like a stretch. And there is evidence in the Pokemon universe of evil Malamar. In one episode of the anime, an evil Malamar controls multiple people and Pokemon before eventually escaping. Which is scary to think about. An evil, giant squid with powers is roaming around. Watch out, folks!
A wonderful cartoony render of Malamar that makes them seem like a villain from Ren & Stimpy.
- Peaceful and nice Malamar do also exist. They appear in the anime too. I’m not sure I could trust one after finding out how powerful they are...
- It uses its powers to lure prey close to it and then uses digestive fluids to kill whatever was unfortunate to get so close. What a way to die, drowning in stomach acid.
- Malamar uses flashing lights on its body as well as different body motions to hypnotize people and creatures. So if just close your eyes or wear some blackout glasses you should be fine.
Wonder if a Smoochum’s trainer freaks out when they are in a public restroom and it starts licking and kissing the toilet flush handle.
-Legless Legolas’ LEGO Lass
Why are you bringing your Pokemon into the bathroom, outside of their Pokeball? I have some questions for that trainer.
Here’s Another Pokemon is a weekly look into one Pokemon and how weird, disturbing, silly, or cool it is and why. Catch new entries each weekend and click here to see all of the past Pokemon we have covered.