Earlier this week Nintendo of America proudly announced that it had hired Mr. Doug Bowser as its new vice president of sales. What I want to know if how he dressed for that interview. I think our readers can help.

Or Steve thought our readers could help and I used his suggestion, even though I can never remember which real name goes with which Kinja handle. Oh wait, it’s sciteach! Thanks, Owen Good email from a year and a half ago!

Now that we’ve gotten that settled, let’s get down to business. There is no way a man named Bowser just walks into Nintendo’s offices in a suit and tie. I mean, sure there’s a way, but that way is reality and no one enjoys reality at all. Outside of reality he could have crashed through the office window in a cart, held the meeting on an axe-controlled drawbridge, or required that the executives interview him three times before admitting defeat and moving on.

Here’s Nintendo’s official shot of Mr. Bowser. Use it nicely, or just go with one of Bowser’s more traditional looks.

Advertisement

All I ask is that we try to keep this one fun. Despite his name, Bowser is a real person who may browse (or bowse) through these entries if he can get past Nintendo of America’s strict office internet filters.

You have until next week, when Doug is replaced with Dave Koopa.

How To Upload Images — Instructions

1. Create your ‘Shop and save it to your desktop. Images must be at least 636 pixels wide. If they aren’t, you will be playfully spanked.

2. Go to the bottom of this post

3. This brings up a comment window. Click

4. This brings up Click “Choose file” if you’re uploading your ‘shop from your desktop

5. Alternatively, you can upload the ‘Shop to a free image hosting service. I suggest imgur. Then paste the image’s URL into the field that says “Image URL.” Note: this must be the URL of the image itself, not the page where it is displayed. That means the URL ends in .jpg, .gif, .png, whatever.

6. Add editorial commentary and hit submit and your image will load. If it doesn’t, upload the image to imgur and paste the image URL as a comment. I promise I will look at it.

7. Large-size images may not upload properly, though we have seen some big-ass animated .gifs upwards of 5 MB. If you’re still having trouble uploading the image, try to keep its longest dimension (horizontal or vertical) under 1000 pixels, or the whole thing under 2 MB.

Advertisement

To contact the author of this post, write to fahey@kotaku.com or find him on Twitter @bunnyspatial.