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I'm Commander Shepard, and These are my Favorite Drinks on the Citadel.

Illustration for article titled Im Commander Shepard, and These are my Favorite Drinks on the Citadel.

The Mass Effect trilogy features a galaxy's worth of exotic, alien-inhabited locations... with a bar in nearly every port ready and waiting to serve the Commander and her intrepid crew the finest of the milky way's brain-draining beverages.

Now you, too, can pull up an emergency induction port—I mean, a straw—and meet the reaper apocalypse in style with these Mass Effect-themed cocktails. The folks over at Save Game have pulled together a themed cocktail menu spanning all three games' worth of companions and allies.

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The whole gang's in here, from Urdnot Wrex (The Quad-Kicker: rum, bourbon, ginger ale, and curry) to James Vega (The Rojo Loco: dark rum, raspberry, cranberry, and lime).

They're all fun and clever, but for descriptions, my favorite is Garrus's drink, "The Heat Sink":

With equal parts Jagermeister, Blue Curacao and Mountain Dew, The Heat Sink is strong and effective, but it tastes awful. So ingest at your own risk.

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I don't think I could drink it, though. For actual consuming, I think I'd go with Tali's "Keelah Se'lemonade," featuring Parfait d'Amour, Mandarin Liqueur, vodka, and lemonade. Though I'd also love to see an Illusive Man drink, even if it would no doubt turn a muddy purple as soon as you touched the glass.

As for the Commander? Well, you'll have to come up with your own drink for Shepard, just as you have to come up with your own Commander. Personally, I think mine's a bourbon drinker who secretly enjoys a frozen strawberry daiquiri on occasion.

Just drink responsibly: you don't want to end up pulling an Ashley. You'll regret it when your commander spends the rest of the game making fun of you.

Save Game's Mass Effect Squadmate cocktails: The best drinks this side of the Citadel [Save Game]

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DISCUSSION

Steve_Buscemi's_Orthodontist

Mass Effect 3, The Ending:

1x 1oz Vodka

1x 1oz White Rum

1x 1oz Gin

1x 1oz White Tequila

1x 1oz Triple Sec

1x 1oz Blue Caraco

1x 8oz can of Red Bull

Mixing instructions:

1) Pour 1oz shots into pint glass (over ice).

2) Put Red Bull (opening down) in glass.

3) Open Red Bull under shots (so it empties as you drink). Drink will turn from light blue to green 4) as you suck down alcohol and it's replaced by Red Bull.

Drink THROUGH straw.

Drinking instructions:

1) Drink 3 of 'em.

2) Drink 'em quickly.

3) Wake up in a dumpster 38 hours later with your pants around your ankles, your wallet stolen, and a black eye.

Done correctly, you'll consume 6-18 shots and 8-24 oz of Red Bull (if you drink the required 3).

You may die.

You may live.

Regardless, you'll feel like crap for a few days.

NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART.