Everything I Want To Do In GTA Online Doesn't Involve Crime

I love open world games. But nine times out of ten, the things I love to do in them don't involve the main premise of the game.

I got the most fun out of Forza Horizon by pretending I was Ryan Gosling. Assassin's Creed III really shined when I stopped the following the missions and just climbed trees.

So when the gameplay trailer for Grand Theft Auto Online dropped today, I wasn't jazzed to rob a bank or steal a car or shoot somebody. I mean, those are nice and all, but here's what I'm actually excited to do.

Have low-rent motocross races in the middle of meth country:

Act like total jackasses around a really nice, old lighthouse:

Arm wrestle a shifty stranger you just met in a filthy, sheet metal shack, Over The Top style:

Go to the supermarket in a private jet, like a comically rich, cartoon billionaire:

Drunk Waverace near Venice Beach:

And lastly, drive dirt bikes off a cliff and paraglide with your drinking buddies:

Now all it needs is a horse mod and a copy of the Scarface soundtrack and I'll be set.