This was originally going to be an article ranking characters’ idle animations in Heroes of the Storm. But then I couldn’t stop staring at Azmodan’s chest. Can you?

Just look at those things!

I guess he was sporting some hefty man-jewelry in that first trailer for Diablo III:

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(hence the terrified reaction)

But I don’t remember them being quite so impressive in the actual game:

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Certainly not as hard-to-ignore and impossible-to-forget as they are in Heroes of the Storm:

Look closer...

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...closer...

just a little bit closer...

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Ok, ok. Too close!

The only thing I can really compare Azmodan’s new nipple rings to, size-wise and fashion-wise, is Wendy’s jewelry in Mario Kart 8:

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In conclusion, “Azmodan’s Nipple Rings” should totally be a special item in Heroes of the Storm. Oh wait, Heroes doesn’t have in-game items like League of Legends and Dota 2. Dammit!


Contact the author at yannick.lejacq@kotaku.com.