Final Fantasy VII's Excellent Pizza Joke Did Not Translate To English

Let's Mosey: A Slow Translation Of Final Fantasy VIILet's Mosey: A Slow Translation Of Final Fantasy VIIPart Japanese grammar lesson and part meditation on the impossibility of a "perfect" translation, Let's Mosey presents a "slow translation" of Final Fantasy VII.

I’ve been playing through Final Fantasy VII in Japanese, and I’m having a good time pointing out little nuances that I didn’t notice when I originally played the game in English 20 years ago.

Last time, we accompanied Aeris as she dressed Cloud up like a girl so they could trick a guy. This time, we’re also going to have a long soliloquy on the subject of some underwear. The 1990s, man! Video games were just cuckoo for underwear.

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We’re also going to attack Shinra Tower, meet Sephiroth, escape the city of Midgar, and learn about Cloud’s past. And there’s a part about—well, I’ll be here all day if I start listing the things with which this video is jam-packed.

I used pizza in the headline because pizza is very important to me. Though now that I have you here: did you know that Aeris has a nickname for Cloud in Japanese that she uses consistently throughout the game, and that that nickname is a reference to the very first meaningful conversation they ever had? That’s really cute. In English, she sometimes calls him “Bodyguard,” which is also a reference to that same conversation, though in Japanese, it’s a little bit different, and it’s sweet as heck.

Also in this video, I reference George Bernard Shaw, we talk about pizza, and we engage in some profound speculation regarding a toilet. If you ask me, that’s the very definition of “something for everybody.”

You can catch up with the whole series on this YouTube playlist, by the way.

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About the author

Tim Rogers

I make videos for Kotaku. I make video games for myself and my friends. I like writing fiction. Someday I will publish a novel. Who knows!