Are you a FIFA fan? Are you also a little baby-human who sometimes just doesn’t want to hear it? Then does EA have the new feature for you! FIFA 23, out for pre-orderers today, will let you turn off commentary that’s critical of how you’re playing. Alternative idea: play better?
Haha, like I can play a FIFA game. Or would want to. But I’d argue that, as your fluent English/American-speaking onlooker at least, the best bit of playing any sport(s) (see: fluent) games is when you’re doing so catastrophically badly, even the game starts laughing at you. It’s hard to get my ego bruised when I don’t care, though many will pick the option simply because they want to have a chill time. Then again, actual children exist. What if this feature is for them? That would make me look like such an a(r)s(e)shole. Yet, I want to believe that children have far thicker skins than that, and this is definitely for whiny soccer fans instead.
But as Eurogamer spotted, there’s now an option in the menus that lets you “Disable Critical Commentary.” At least, in theory. Eurogamer tested the mode out (look, I’d do it too, but I tried running it and it simultaneously crashed both Steam and Origin—they don’t want to play it either), and discovered it just kept criticizing the play anyway. So maybe it’s an amazing troll.
Commentary in FIFA 23 is probably provided by Wayne Geezer and Sir Rafferty Earl-OBE, the two swapping witty bon mots and aggressive c-words, as you simulate the act of blandly kicking a ball from one end of a field to the other, without any other elements involved at all. However, it seems now they’ll be limited to criticizing the strength of each other’s cups of tea rather than your pressing-a-button skills.
Baseball is the only proper sport. Thank you, move on.