That's it, DC Comics needs to revoke Turbine's license to create variant versions of iconic heroes for MOBA Infinite Crisis. I draw the line at popped-collar, sandals-with-socks "SoCal Hal" Green Lantern.

I can handle "Lifeguard" Aquaman. I don't mind "Track & Field" Robin and "Varsity" Supergirl. But a line must be drawn somewhere, and Southern California seems as good a place as any. From today's new costume's official description:

SoCal Hal will let you be a bro with the best of 'em. He's got the backwards hat. That's a pretty clutch start. Then you got the sandals and sick black socks. Pretty good! Pretty good, dude. But it's that collar, yo, that popped collar is way baller! Then you got the accessories to match the green power ring—the watch, the necklace, and that sweet Green Lantern jersey.

I hate him so much. I just tried playing a match with Green Lantern in the costume, and I lost — against A.I. opponents. Either I am incredibly bad at playing a ranged character in Infinite Crisis, or I've been blinded by rage. I'll go back and do a game as "Diablo Rojo" luchador Red Lantern Atrocitus to be sure.